owner of the cute eyes

your eyes is a healer to me
its make yourself to look inside and outside of me
your eyes is picture for me
its makes myself always stare into it
your eyes is brown color
the color that relaxing my eyes when im look at you
your eyes so crystal water
that you are an innocence person
your eyes is sharp and focus
i like when you stare at something and it was like a fish eye (ikan gapi you know!!)

hope your eyes doesnt caught any serious thing
hope your eyes stay the way it is
hope your eyes get well soon
if i found doraemon
im sure i will ask him about a gadget that can make you eyes better
but for now you should go to check it at your doctor
hopefully and im praying for you to get well
because i love your cute eyes and of course the owner of the cute eyes...

p/s: kamu!! itu saket kalu datang lagi u kasi pijam sama itu mata yaa... tp i mmg xkasi laa u jd pirate ker cyclop ker... take care dear!

a.l.o.n.e.

alone I drift away
alone I walk a thousand miles
alone I fall asleep
alone I stare at the sky
alone I sit under a tree
alone I cry

alone I dream of you
alone I hope and pray
to God who is so merciful and powerful
to let me find my way

alone I drift away
alone I live today
and alone I'll die someday

After awhile...

its kinda long time im not updated my blog
not really a long time...
it just sometimes i wanna write but still the time jealous towards me
hurmm~ but now here i am writing without endless point and path

Meanwhile...

im kinda loss of something
'something' that really important for me and for you
it fill my emptiness and courage me everyday
but it loss again
glued by glued it helps a bit
and now the chemical of it doesnt seems to hold on it
so, i losing it again
its weird and it bring sad to me when im not wearing it
replacement is a must
and im should do something here
otherwise, im live my life in my own empty space
sorry to you cause i loss our symbol
the symbol that guide us everyday and make us feel of it, when one of us being faraway
no matter what happen
im still what you think i am
and i will never make you feel sad about it...

deep inside me
it is something special about 'it'
deep inside me
it is memory we create it
deep inside me
it is you and me
deep inside me
it is everything...

damn dirty them

why should i get stuck here?
walking and acting like i own 8 hands and of course 8 legs
up down left right
circle it square it
all angle i should cover
man! even goalkeeper only cover his own goal post
why should i?
find found list
journalist
drag type creative-stoner
designer
haha understand what i mean?
try if you can...
damn dirty them

p/s: kamu~thanx for the nidji showcase + tag + VIP ya ;) im so happy to be with you on that day and i like gua's staff oledi...kehkehkeh

Advice from your sad friend

it almost 6.00pm
and this is it
the moment that my word been clarify
and he should throw the word to testify
whatever happen i knew you already
please change for a sake of your life
not for anyone... all this is for you
think about your parent, your brother and sister
they dont want you to be like this
inside me, im crying...
inside me, im deeply sad...

so make up your right decision!!
choose to change my friend!!

p/s: btw..kamu! i miss you...

Question to the 'other' me?

what else can i write?
am i an emo person?
why i always think the unthinkable matters?
am i hungry?
am i talking with myself again?

no! im talking to the 'other' me...
have no idea to mumble
so lets go out and take some refreshment...

What makes a friend

a friend
what makes a friend?
a friend
is someone that everyone needs
a friend
is that special one
a friend
is someone you tell EVERYTHING
a friend
is someone you never lie to
a friend
can be a boy or a girl
a friend
is someone that is always their
a friend
will always listen to you
a friend
always has input to give
a friend
will never leave you in the dust
a friend
will help you through the thick and the thin
a friend
will always stand by your side
a friend
will never let you down
a friend
is someone everyone needs
what would you do if you didnt have a friend?

p/s: i wish it was a nightmare!!!

My friend

dear my friend
hope you read my words
the words that really matters for us
that appreciate it as a friendship
the way you act
the way you talk
the way you behave
nothing much different as the 'old' you that i knew
i love the moment we been hangout together
drink at 'mamak'
'dota' at cyber cafe
everything is there at the 'old' time
everything is complete for us to share the happy things
but.. now! everything is most hopeless for us to re-build it again as a good buddies
where is your honesty of trusting your friends
where is your dignity that you said you put it very high
even almost nobody cant reach it...
where is the true friendship when you said you can be our ears and eyes to share the problems.. even you! yourself hiding in your true problem without let us hear it until now..
im shocked
im scared
im frustrated
im totally mad at you
i wish this is a dream that we called it nightmare
but it is true, to understand, to interpret, to act..
so please my friend
why should you feel like this
i know in other places its not wrong
but for me, in my honest word 'it sick'
i dont want to hate you
because you, my friend
we care
we love
we chat
we act
we share
all because you are our good friend!!
a good friend never hypocrite
a good friend always show the honesty in being a friend
a good friend doesnt hiding the problem that suppose to be share
so please..please..please and i repeat it please
if you care about our friendship dont do it
and dont you ever try to bond with it
find a good friend better that us to change yourself
in a better and a right path..
all this because you are our good friend!!!

p/s: hope you read it my friend..this is the word from me even though it is more inside, but to clear it up we must talk.. honest doesnt change... :(

There's A Kiss

there's a kiss to say I love you,
there's a kiss to say I care,
there's a kiss to prove our friendship,
there's a kiss for us to share,
there's a kiss to say it's true,
but the kiss I love the most,
is the kiss I get from you...

Small soldier invade my body

thank god! my internet connection recovered
after for quite long been waiting, now i post one maybe two or three
im not feeling well today
damn i wish i brought my 'bantai buchuk' along
flu, are attacking me from each part of my body
weak and weak im going to be
probably 'they' want to group their soldier of fever to help 'them' to weak my body
a dozen of tissue paper i used
there fill out my dustbin, full of tissue that i used to take off the small soldier of flu
haha im might be to imaginative to say something that perhaps someone would understand me
but others, my words are crap... but for sure i dont give a shit
i just write what i want

after working maybe i go to see my old-old band mate called 'regicide'
at last we been united again to do something that we care, we love and we proud of...

REGICIDE members are:

1.kojack (thats me)-the silence sound guitar + vocalist 'mendayu dan terjerit2 tanpa arah tuju' (1st buleh 2nd pun buleh)

2.kim-the sticky drum + vocalist 'yang nak jadi ala2 Brandon Boyd + Glay + Once jadi laa mcm S.M Salim tak pun Salleh Yaacob)

3.ayie-bass man bombom

4.kobet-frying flaming guitar

but where is the vocalist? so far me and kim are the vocalist... haha i can sing to but if the riff is to heavy for me to handle we should 'upah' someone to 'nyayi' lah

and there it goes! hope and im hoping with this come back we can manage something to be done.

p/s: sambil menaip sambil menghembus kan atau meng'seeh'kan hingguih yang buat penat nak piki... my body is getting panas and panas laa :( kamu kim salam your mum skali ye...

"with great power come with great responsibility"

yesterday my superhero been drugged by her medicine that she took
she so tired, so sleepy and so not in a good mood to save a day
she should rest after she took that medicine that originality influenced by drug
cough,cold and fever,this combining enemy doesnt threat her to give up to save the day...
but actually the drug made her feel floating in the sky and sometime she said "dear im losing my balance to walk"
haha..that is the impact of evil drug that really make sick people to be ok again!
so let me warn to the virus, just go away evil sickness!! you dont know yet who is her, and what capability that she got to kill you all and make you suffer...
i hope my superhero ok today
whether i know she might probably busy today saving all the problem there

but i missed my superhero sms today...
but its ok...

RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE JAPAN TOUR 2008

my favorite band will be in asia which is Japan and im sure a lot of you guys love ratm, they were icon to me and they are my inspiration for me to fight for our rights + the music itself!... after all long gone and with all personal matters now ratm come to provoke + to give a preach + to rebel.. and thats what we should do and to join them to be a freedom fighter!

Thursday 7 February
OSAKA CASTLE HALL
Doors open:6pm/Show start:7pm
Ticket: •9,000(Arena:Standing/2F:Seat)
INFO:06-6535-5569(SMASH WEST)

Saturday 9 & Sunday 10 February
TOKYO MAKUHARI MESSE
Doors open:5pm/Show start:6:30pm
Ticket: •9,000(All Standing)
INFO:03-3444-6751(SMASH)







p/s: i wanna go to japan to watch this great ever consert of my entire life... but
:( no money 9000 yen!!! *watashiha have chotto money* waaaa!!... concert start in this coming february 2008... and i sad i cant go there to watch my idol... :( hope you guys that reading my blog join ya! and tell me about that damn great concert! Hasta La Victoria Siempre!!!

*I miss you*

Sooner or Later

some of them just talk
and hope its easy to execute
for them it is a business
but is it worth it for me?

I just pretend to be understand
understand the words they are talking about
I cant do it well the way they left it
it just the way it is, nod your head
and nod my head?

two for one
it just like something budget isn't it?
hope they will find others to join
or I will be rebel for as long I live here
will I stay long here? haha...

problem solving was not in the list
the list that they should focusing more
I have no intention to saying bad about it
but can they think about themselves properly?

stress
anger
disoriented
tired
fed-up

all those words when im combine it
they will know it
just I am way too much patience inside
to become REBEL...rebel with a cause!

Summary of 2 days

Weekend baru ni aku terpakse come to work saturday & sunday actually for fcr event (friendly comparative religion). But on saturday aku hanya masuk untuk 1st session jer maknernyer morning session so, afternoon session aku terpakse buat keje lain. Kerja itu adalah men-design atau meng-alter segala content & a bit of design layout for "The Criteria" newspaper, yang mana staff department tu da diberhantikan atas dasar2 yang malaih aku nk cite kat sini! So, they want me urgently to join that department sebab depa tau aku memang nk masuk into that field of job. So, i take it! Well! so much to be corrected in terms of words and so much to re-arrange the layout and also the graphics in there. Its cool enough for me to be a part of "The Criteria" team... hahaha but its not a team really actually only me kot yang wat design2, no new staff yet nak masuk... huuu~ so on saturday afternoon, my job is to working on that thing called newspaper! YEAY! balik lambat seh!!! huh... on saturday gak berlangsung kat Old Trafford, MANCHESTER UNITED benamkan NEWCASTLE UNITED 6-0 yeay!!(kamu sangat ong la kalu tgk skali huuu~) watashiha ureshii!!

So, talk about sunday... aku datang lambat sebab nak drop my dear kat LCCT (dia ada some sort of staff discussion + vacation kat Langkawi *best tuh) so, dalam perjalanan die ke my house agak funny gak biler die citer, die tringat kat my story yang mana time tuh aku tgh dok memberi 'pelan induk' bagaimana jalan and highwat nak ke rumah aku... so, biase laa aku kalu da bersembang nak kene ade gaya tangan2 tuh nak tunjuk ngan lebeh detail selain drpd melukis plan kat 'our book' hehe.. Then somehow, my hand just like making something that make her laugh haha actually aku pon xperasan aku buat camtuh nyer gaya kalu ade 8 tangan senang nk tunjuk.. ni ade due tangan terpakse laa kene goyang2 kan sket xkan nk tunjuk ngan mulut kot... tapi memang lawak!!! then one more issue is aku nak cakap kat die camni, " you ikut highway nak pi seremban, klia, jepon tu tau!! highway plus..ok..)then die tergelak lagi akibat bf die yang sengal nk pi jepon cakap plak camtuh, mcm laa highway kat Malaysia ni bleh pi setarus ke jepon hahaha.. actually aku nk ckp highway ke Johor not Jepun hahaha sengalnyer aku nih!! so die manage laa sampei ke my house! then.. (nyayi sket part nih) seiji ~ kun lari gagah berani.. haha dengan lajunyer aku drive die pi LCCT.. then da smp, da amik tiket, da beli film, pi laa McD nk mkn sat xb'fast lagi.. sian die sempat mkn segigit Fillet o Fish jer and beberape teguk milo ice jer, then die pun gerak ke dalam.. waaaa sedih wooo part tuh waaaa!! btw i hope you enjoy your trip there yaa!! miss you!!

p/s: kamu if ada sen sket cari laa souvenir for me yaa ;) take care!!

2nd for us and lets hold it forever :)

Damn-nation of work

what i done is to follow the instruction
sometimes the instruction might probably wrong
should i follow? should i throw the damn instruction into a garbage?
hell yeah! i throw the instruction more deeper than it was suppose to be.
then i speak up the way i am, to see how much they will understand about me
finally i won! but not an official victory!
I got to wait for a couple of days to be crown as a winner...
to be work as operator, a mover, an interior cleaner/designer, head event organizer, graphic/web/sound/visual design...blablablabla...
too much from me to be divided myself into a pieces.
maybe i would like to living hell in newspaper section
that topic i was talk to the 'boss' that i want to move myself into other world
the 'boss' look so understand my situation and i hope what she said will be reality,
or else i will...you know what i should do right!
promise is promise...
so i just wait to see it comes to me!!

What a Fright Day

-Is it something happen to me?
-Rasa xsedap hati jer...
-Loss of appetite just drink, drink and wee wee...
-What's going on!?

(maybe i'm over thinking) :|

ACTIVITY AFTER BORINGNESS

task 1

another boring day probably is a gift to me, just now i had an informal discussion with my big boss. she want me to block all my agenda on this february and march every 2nd week on each month which feb & mar to attend this meeting organize by ACCIN (allied coordinating committee of Islamic N.G.O.s, so i represent as IIS. man! this is huge for me to take the responsible to attend and to spread an idea on what topic that they discuss, so im part of them! and better quiet if nothing to say isnt it?

task 2

i got to call this staff named kak adawiyah to ask her about this whole year '08 activity regarding FCR and also event that organize by IIS. thats cool, calling people to know that things but its hell when that person doesnt have a soft copy about the event and its kinda hard for me laa.. i got to tulis while im on the phone man that's crap... hopefully she already type it on Word laa if not my fingers will not able to write blog again because of it... + big boss said she want me to redesign the actual layout for this particular page, she said again "as long as simple no much flashy2 thing because kite bagi information kat org jer" then i nodding my head, a sign of understand what she saying..hah!

task 3

its about design to but in a process of brainstorming the main page of IIS fuhh!! byk2 lagi la pening my head to encounter this situation. hope i will pass this test laa.. if not i will flying without a wings! masak + rentung beb.. da la sorg2 je handle, but i try and i try not to say no to do it. GAMBATTE KUDASAI SEIJI~KUN HAIIIT YATTA!!!

CRAZY NOW

i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because the cold is too much
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because outside is heavily rain and storm
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because here only myself is a life form + 'that thing'
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because repeating the same old songs again & again
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because i keep writing & posting
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because i can't think the simple idea for something
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because someone there is sick because cappucino
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because someone there is missing me
i think i'm crazy now!!!
crazy because of her & i love her

i think i'm crazy now!!!

p/s: one crazy day in my boring office huuuhhh!!

Watch, Learn, Understand and Express

Just to recall my memory inside here,
Been together with you is so much fun,
To watch, to learn, to understand and to express,
It's kind a sad when actually you sick because that 'power cappuccino',
Sumimasen.. but the effect of that, you just like a 'hyper girl' that loves to run here and there with trolley..its cute you know!,

Just to recall my memory inside here,
Been together with you is so much fun,
To watch, to learn, to understand and to express,
Writing with someone in same book is new for me..and sometimes i just stuck a word to be writing down,
But somehow how i know that is the way we share every minutes and every seconds together like peanut butter sandwich bread,
We write we draw we questioning each other there..and i like it,

Just to recall my memory inside here,
Been together with you is so much fun,
To watch, to learn, to understand and to express,
When you dressed like that i just fall in love once again with you,
You look so cute and you look so nice should i total it to be a beautiful..yeah you are beautiful inside and outside,
Its stop my heart for sure,

Just to recall my memory inside here,
Been together with you is so much fun,
To watch, to learn, to understand and to express,
We walking side by side and somehow we walking separately for one purpose,
The purpose is for surprising each other,
Walking separately for the surprise,
And somehow after a while we've been separate,
We meet that 'i-setan' with shocking faces and empty hand of surprise,
But we already surprise to meet on that time whether actually we still searching,
Haha..i love that moment,

Just to recall my memory inside here,
Been together with you is so much fun,
To watch, to learn, to understand and to express,
Hope you will be happy for what i give and what i've done,
And i cant hardly wait to hand over it to you,
To you i wish a happy birthday and may happiness always be with you,
And for us i wish we will be like peanut butter and sandwich bread and always enjoy and appreciate our relationship + arigatougozaimasu...

p/s: xnak ajak kamu gi minum coffee dah.. kite layan cendoi ngan pasemboq pon ok... hope u will get better dear *demmit punyer serbuk kopi wat kamu rase sick nnt kite bakaq sume ladang kopi kat cameron highland :p

:-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-)
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip!
:-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-)

"The Scorpio person is passionate, powerful, penetrating, intense, determined, compelling, purposeful, keenly perceptive, brave, deep, complex, analytical, inquisitive, sensual, mysterious, resourceful, ambitious, magnetic, hypnotic, creative, intriguing, profound, loyal, supportive, protective, generous, humble, quiet, and encompassing. They are also self-critical, investigative, passionately caring, tenacious, dynamic, probing, emotional, concerned, compassionate, and shock-proof. They have intense concentration and they understand failings.

On a bad day a Scorpio tends to be self-destructive, ruthless, overbearing, suspicious, jealous, possessive, dangerous, quick-tempered, obstinate, moody, sadistic, insulting, secretive, intolerant, cunning, vindictive and terribly insecure."

Attributes

Likes
Mystery, secrets, privacy, loyalty, passion, strength, being acknowledged, integrity, willpower, strategy.

Dislikes
deceit, apathy, being questioned, excessive compliments, easily tempered, insincerity, embarrassment, passivity.

Suitable occupations
detective (aiyark kene jd detective conan laa), pathologist, surgeon (haha bedah-bedah), scientist, researcher, undertaker (ni baru black metal sket), insurer, market analyst, butcher (wow), member of the armed service, politician (xmo sama skali get involve), actor (you nk i jd ni kn), artist (sama camni pon), or pharmacist."

-taken from wikipedia

p/s: ade sket2 laa kene gak huhu.. but i am what i am...

Melody + Love

this past week probably the planning moment
but i don't know whether it will going well
hope it does, and sure this is a first time

this coming week is the reveal moment
for you to appreciate the day that you are suppose to
and surely i don't know whether it's going to be a of surprise or not

but deep inside here is really sincere of what i'm trying to do
whether it will happen or not...

hope you will like it the 'thing' i will give to you!
and play it with love...
to come out a melody called melove...

p/s: one more to come but surely you don't know it, hope i can achieve that 'thing' to you

I will never love you less

Being with you has changed
my life in many different ways
without you I don't think my
days could possibly be the same

I can't find words to say
how you truly make me feel
but one thing that I'm sure of
is that this feeling for you is real

you cheer me up when I'm sad
you make me laugh when I get mad
you're the one I trust the most
I love the fact that we're so close

I have given you the key to my heart
I miss you everytime that we're apart
I know I may not be the best
but I will never love you less

1st in the dawn of 2008

i still remember on that moment
focusing on what i suppose to do
im here to protect you
im hear to escort you
im hear to comfort you

but suddenly...

when the pedal been stepped to stop and so on
the word came seriously through out my mouth
to say, the famous word for this new year
"Normal"
it goes like this, "Kamu~ I da normal!"
then like a speeding bullet
she continue the scene with laughing out loud
at 1st, i kinda bit confused,
and somehow i realize that my word "Normal" didnt fit to be used on that action

so...

i think about it
the proper word for free gear in auto transmission is "Neutral"
meanwhile, she's still laughing and of course myself joining her to laugh to myself
haha..what a day!

before that...

our mind and our thought has been tickle
it just a matter to blow out loud haha
the incident that makes us wanted to continue the laughing is...
haha, this one guy came across a zebra crossing then
after step his feet step on the side walk
he make something funny to me to look it at
he's walking facing back to us together with his action
that make us laugh...

know what...

he's pull his under wear
maybe because "tersangkut dicelah-celah kot"
that's why la people, dont use "spender cap buaya"
nak pakai gak, cover-cover la nk tarik-tarik tuh...
as i said to her that is a people called "rem-ki"
rempit yg xder motor, hanya meng-huha kan diri dgn berjalan kaki, so i called them "rem-ki"
its cool to witness that situation that no one would never want to look
hahaha...

because of the "rem-ki", the "normal" word comes out confidently... what to do..
jom gelak-gelak! *ckp ala-ala Maria Tun Sabri ok

Stuck, and finally been written

thank you.. for giving this in my life
thank you.. for let me in and feel this emotion
thank you.. for those who learn to love me
thank you.. for being a helper when im needed
thank you.. for being an ears to me when im sad
thank you.. for the laughter that makes me happy all days
thank you.. for caring and understand me
thank you.. it is just a word that really means a lot to me

this is one of the words that stuck in my head in 07
and im glad you keep knowing me and im appreciate that...

arigatou gozaimasu, aishiteru!

07 - 08

2007 to be let and keep as memories
2008 are welcome to write a new chapter of my life
2007 something that i remember of that story
sadness and happiness build around that time
without that time i never be like this
without that time i probably live like normal me
the painful feeling also has recover at the end of that time
and it shall continue to normalize it for the next future time

i love 2007
i miss 2007
may 2008 bring us a happiness
and prosperity...

2007 at the beginning are damned hurt enough
2008 never make it happen what i been through
2007 will stand in our memory for us to smile and to appreciate
2008 are welcome whether we want to stop it
but, why should i? haha

2008 is a challenge for me...

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL PEOPLE

p/s: kamu! malam kang yaa! ermm ape azam kamu ek? mine, xtau lagik sat g nak pikiaq sat..huhu happy new year to you!!

stop the dot

.................
the dot that has to be stop
.................
the dot that makes people wandering
.................
the dot that makes a person waiting
.................
the dot is the dot stop whenever you saw a dot.
.................

Counting the days

So here I go and there you went...again
Just another stupid thing that I done wrong.
Locked up in my head, knocked down, beaten, left for dead
With all those brilliant things I should have said.
I gotta get away, and find something to do
'Cause everything I hear, everything I see, reminds me of you.

Still counting the days I've been without you 1, 2, 3, 4...
Still counting the days that you've been gone.

Day one, was no fun.
Day two, i hated you.
By day three I wish you'd come right back to me.
Day four, five and six, well I guess you just don't give a shit.
Day seven, this is hell. this is hell.
I gotta get away, and find something to do.
But everything I hear, everything I see, reminds me of you.

Still counting the days I've been without you 1, 2, 3, 4...
Still counting the days that you've been gone.
Still counting the days since you left me. 1,2,3,4...
Still counting the days since you've been gone.

A thousand things I wanna say to you, but it's too late now.
A thousand things I wanna say...
A thousand things I wanna say to you, but it's too late now.
A thousand things I wanna say...

Still counting the days I've been without you.
Still counting the days that you've been gone.
Still counting the days I've been without you 1, 2, 3, 4...
Still counting the days that you've been gone.
Still counting the days since you left me 1, 2, 3, 4...
Still counting the days that you've been gone.
Gone...
Gone...
Gone...
Gone...

p/s: when u post the cure's song titled friday im in love, suddenly it remind me about the song that relate to "days" but it is "counting the days" by Goldfinger. my favorite punk band and this band also is one of my biggest influence, and hope u like the song and the lyric that full of emotion. I love it..

Life goes on...

Dah hampir 3weeks aku keje kat cni.. mcm2 aku dengar, baik bende buruk or baik. yela mane ade company yg nk always ok je.. but, they should give a good impression to me because im a new staff here! today, probably the last day of "the criteria" newspaper team, they all resigning. all those 3 people sadly describe talk about their experience in their past in working here. so, aku pun layan je.. sebelah derang aku dengaq sbelah sane pon aku dengaq, its not fair to listen to one side only.. mcm U.N plak aku ni, padahal just nk mendgr cite memasing... huih! yesterday my bos said that she will need me to join the newspaper group immediately, ok for me its fine.. as long as my salary increase, and i all the equipment that needed is available thats all... as others can work as a team itu dari sight of social and environment working... bukan cam skarang, aku duk ofis aku layan lepak sorg2 cakap ngan pc je... mati kutu besar you tuh huu~

at the same time i try to seek other job, kalu ade rezeki terpakse la pindah port keje and start a new life once again... best gak time2 skarang layan lagu rock kekapak, terase mcm jd org batu jap. so, today cam biase as they told me yesterday "firdaus esok angkat table kat bwh ni 2 biji naik atas ok!" "awak arrange laa ngan staff2 lain ye tuk angkat table besar tuh" what? nak kene angkat table? my work ni da jadik cam agensi pindah2 n angkat brg lak..kalu bukak satu business ni kompem leh kayeee!!! haih life goes on!! sabar ek pn SABA..

Writing turn me to express the insanity

Wake up in middle of the darkness inside me alone,
Brings me a lot of question to be answer by myself,
What is it? i don't understand what im trying to ask and to answer,
I caused by the darkest view that i cant see it well or shall i say im blind,
What can i do to solve this little mystery inside of me?
Should i run?
Should i walk?
Should i sleep?
Or should i sing?

Here? singing? nahh!! if people hear of me, they probably lose their ears,
Back to the agenda, what is it? what the hell is my question to myself,
And of course it must be an proper answer,
Hah! this is a conflict between me and myself,
I don't know what actually the other me said,
But the normal me feel something wrong there,
It wont speak up,
Or even give a sign a bit,

The conclusion of my case i think,
I should give sometimes to myself to drink 'nescafe'
Maybe it is an impact cause of it, i dont know what to hear and say,
Just like to question and to answer...

Im just like an "ikan pekasam" that live in my very territory alone,
And im just connected to "filetfish12" through this, phone (*wahh ikan pon pandei gune tepon huhu~)and in the inside...





p/s: let's go for some fishing in the darkest pond inside...

Undercover to be busy

Today as usual nothing much to be busy. but im try to be it... with all the dozen of files to be arrange properly until i got flu *haccchooo!!. yesterday dinner with you kinda fun moment because of the "sakat-menyakat" happen between u and me. its ok for me, and i know your intention is to make me feel hahaha tension... huu~ u like to see me in that kind of situation but hey..its cool and sometimes i miss the way u "sakat-sakat" it just keep repeating inside out my head. without u there's no more "se-sakat" *short form kan die...

Its fun when u do that, feels like im out of word to counter u back, but maybe on that time my super power of counter didn't come yet, huhu.. and one more thing, im so glad that the things that i thought u will get mad at me is actually ok for u.. but anyway sumimasen kamu, and i hope that it wont make an effect between us.. oh man! sometimes i just like a stupid person that always over think about it, and i dont get it. but that is the reality of me. and i hope u understand that, and guide me to our path... whether, i know u dont like myself to apologize to u every times..but today i should say that word again because i feel guilty, SUMIMASEN...

Anyway, its fun with u with all those "kantoi tatabahasa" makes me happy around u... and i know u know this word... aishiteru :)

p/s: just got a phone call from my boss... she ask me to find the file in the boxes, padahal da dapat da td... die kate xcomplete...ARARRGGGGGHHHH!!!

Here & There

here and there,
its all about problem,
here and there,
the truth and the fake we can see,
here and there,
back stabbing people with an ugly voice,

and sure its only 3 weeks here...
a lot of news,
a lot of propaganda,
beneath the word the holy word of 'islamic',

cant predict to make assumption,
but they can,
they will,
but im not,
but it sure enough to tells me...
about here and there,

only time can change this situation..
and i hope it will be better enough for me..
for them i hope they should open the third eye,
which is inside there to judging people...
here and there is quite the same but different effect.

2 p.m in and im about to off

i just don't know how to write today, but im still want to write it. it is kind of mixed emotion again that really want to accompany me everytime whenever i feel alone... anger with the working place, love and miss to your girlfriend, sick of cold and so much things that i cant describe it... only time and my life flow will determine what shall i do to make it better, beauty, lovable, precious, and ....

what can i do to make things better? am i wrong? maybe cause im too stupid to understand myself...

p/s: :-)i dedicate this song to you and i know you love this song especially when they play 'live'... YOU HAVE STOLEN MY HEART...

I miss her smile, laugh, eye, cheek and the most important thing is her heart..

im gonna miss you a lot,
i dont know why,
whether it is just for a moment,
but for me my heart is away from you,
i dont want to feel like that,
i just wanna close to you,

your voice might be a remedy,
to cure,
to heal,
to treat,
is all there in your voice,
the voice of you is the best remedy for me not others,

im gonna miss you a lot,
it just because i love you so much,
so that my finger writing this words,
to remind me and you about my feeling,
feeling..of missing you...

aishiteru!

p/s: kamu! jgn lupe yer pict kamu tabik2 lak kehkehkeh.. take care and i miss you girl!! :-)

Talk show hope its not gonna mute

today i got to setup a proper place for this coming talk show event by sheikh imran hosein not meet uncle hussein ok..haha.. in my very office. i got to tarik wayer panjang2, got to cari meja nk letak amp n mixer haha bab2 menyetup ni mmg best, tp kan can make my head goes dizzy all day long if tak jadi! but i try my best to setup my place to become... "the talk show place". the topic kind a cool to about "dajjal, gog & magog" this speaker is very popular in new york and he is cool i think..

till now yaa.. today mlm kene drive balik KEDAH huhuhu~

Mute 2nd week

2nd week of working
its boring
and it is a life of working actually
im gonna get use of it perhaps
hmmmpphhh (ala-ala 'Andy Lau' dlm 'Warlord')!!

You and the my old words

i like to see your eyes
it just so clear calm like a clear water on a blue beach
that makes me calm when im with you

i like to see your smile
the smile that keeps me smile all the day im with you
and the smile that always remind me to you

i like to see when you are walking
the grace of your step carefully i watch till im feel ok
you walk to the path with me together we are one

i like to understand deep in your heart
which i know you are such a kindness, loving, caring person
i wish i could spend my time inside your heart

i never felt like this before
i never come to this moment before
all i just saying is just keep repeating the same old words
that im really meant it!!

I love you always
I love you with all my heart
I LOVE YOU... :)

p/s: finally, for a long time da xsqueeze midori nye pipi akhirnyer seiji~kun dapat gak smlm 2 time ok! haha seiji~kun nyer kulit amfibia that why la peluh2 huhuhu..

Nitrus - Kamu

Umpama bidadari
Yang turun dari kayangan
Indah nian tak berbandingan
Terasa bagai disentuh bayangan mu

Sesungguhnya kamu terang bagaikan cahaya
Yang menyinari hidupku dikala ku kelam.. kelam
Terciptalah aku tuk kali pertama
Dan akan ku buktikan kesungguhan dari hati ini
Hati ini…

Umpama bidadari
Kau selalu menyenangkan aku
Biar kadang ku terkeliru
Izinkan aku menyentuh bayanganmu

Terciptanya aku untuk kau

p/s: this song remind me about you! everytime i play it, it seems that you and me are listening and sing it together.. all that i want to say is, this song is "special" for me and you! NITRUS ROCK!!

The lonely ant life

today im just sitting in my office without any stuff to do, while listening to "lagu untukmu" by Meet Uncle Hussain" and viewing people down there, i think about myself and whats gonna happen to me next... is it good or is it bad? i just can think about it..but i cant change what it suppose to be happen.. it scared me, and sometimes i just don't want to think about it. its all about myself, my working life, my relationship life and so on. but mostly i just think about my carrier my job, huh... (at least i have a job and why should i complaining to myself?)hah, probably my life doesn't bond here and i need to be socialize but not like this...talking to myself everyday.. it can turn me to be an insane person laughing all alone, smoking all alone, and of course living here in the office all alone! i don't how much longer can i stand of this scenario.. i will wait and see how will it go, and i will follow the flow of my instinct to what should i do next...

looking at the small creature called ant walking solo without any of his tribe in front of my table makes me wonder how pity to be live alone and trying to survive a life without communicating to others. just you imagine, what should you do if you a lost and lonely ant without any socialize life. haha! for me im sure that i can live, but im dead from the inside and slowly it eats the outside part! so, scary woo! i know i should do something before it turns to be like...i don't know how to say! but im glad im still not alone 100% cause i got you.. you know YOU! i feel so alive when we communicate.. and im so thankful to you ARIGATOU! if not.. i die like ant up here huhu~ better i go for smoke for a while then i continue...

After smoking

hah! its surprising me already while i smoke in the toilet the i meet Mr. Halim and we were chat. he is kind of iraninan and an chief editor of "the criteria" newspaper that founded by SABA and all the financial matter covered by ABIM. but the thing is would you believe to make a newspaper that release once a month the workers that done it is only 3 person including Mr. Halim! OMG! who's going to be photographer? designer? journalist? and other post that need to be have, but the reality is this 3 hardworking people that doing their job well. he said to me, that actually SABA have a lack of weakness. OK! i been taken by Mr Halim to tour their office then i see, only 1 desktop that actually got to be for designing purpose and another one is laptop for correction of grammar mistake... i couldn't imagine how this guys do their job. Mr Halim said he tried already asked Puan Saba for increasing the number of computers and also the staffs but she haven't yet solve the problem. all that i know is, Puan Saba wants me to be up here to "guard" this office..but she actually should put me in publishing department because theres short of staff. what can i do! but Mr Halim want me to join the team, its kind a cool if i work there! haha what can i say, i just wait for the right moment to discuss this for! actually he kind of sad to look me staying alone in the other side of office.. nobody to talk, nobody to make a laugh and what so ever... then the final word from him is, try la talk to Puan Saba about you want to join this team, then i say, ok..i'll talk to her when the time has come!
after that, here i am again writing without any conclusion.. just write and write..

p/s: kamu! i forget la what is your blog address... nnt kamu kasi tau ya! hope you write when you have something to express... :-)

The cycle of emotion collide


just like im blind
my ears are deaf probably
my arms and legs could be paralyzed

try to make myself moving
but suddenly it just couldn't happen
but if it happen i might stumble onto the ground

the things that really function is
my heart and my brain
but i just couldn't live my life like this

well it seems like im eager to rebel with my own
my own of goodness and badness
im blurred right now

maybe time will solve it out
and i flow with the motion of solution
but i have my second heart to listen to

without it i probably lost everything
everything that i love
everything that i miss

yes, its myself again that reflect this situation
why should i rebel to myself?
it might be not a rebel, it this a part of my life

the way my emotion express maybe like this
going around and around through my head
and then it kept, deep inside

what..am i writing about this?
arghh! maybe today not my day
and i shall give it to other people

blurred, confused..with it
i should try first
and it just started

i hope it will be better
or else im a loser...

Colder than a giant ice cube

look through out my window,
i can see a car wash down there,
the worker busy washing, vacuuming, and polish the customer's car,
ermm what a day for me up here looking down there people doing something,
even though it just stop raining but people a coming there to wash a car,
ermm its kind of weird activity or shall i say a weird community here
likes to wash a car during rainy season,
it find for me if the rain a fully stop then the sun waving down u,
its fine..its fine..thats mean go wash your car,
but if the sun still sleeping with its smooth and soft black cloud,
it mean sun will sleep laaa.. and will not come out!
so what do they trying to do after 10 minute finished washing then suddenly
the rain comes heavily and makes me wonder about all the customer
that went to that car wash place...

weird but its true,
live and clear up here,
see the drama of silence people,
and move your brain to think about,
and the thing that u think will make it sense...

i walkout through my office
to sense some heat that sun left
and the weird thing is,
its kind of scary part i think,
i feel myself been followed,
maybe 'the thing' wanted to join me,
u know where..toilet of course..
i just let it be,
as long as it doesn't show off..
that is scary + weird,
maybe now 'the thing' are sit beside me,
i don't know...
but at least it give me a sweat laa..
because of kecuakkan yg telah terjadik..

A road to MIRACLE explanation

its like when the trees need the sun to live
its like when u were chasing by a rottweiler of course u will run as fast as the flash
but somehow... if the trees doesn't need the sun and u don't run when rottweiler chase u
what will it be?
a logical thinking might thought about dead, yeah.. suppose to be dead or struggle to inhale the last breath of u..
but in other thought, the trees and the person could be alive and survive

ITS A MIRACLE...

all i want to express is, believe of what u believe and hope for the best to come

MIRACLE is a dream for all that like to be a dreamer
just like me...
bored in this office then the MIRACLE happen..
a work is been given (angkat barang ke store) wallawehh!! THANK GOD!

2nd Day of travel and 1st for us

its like when u travel to balik kampong in a long distance u can see sawah padi, pokok getah ker, rumput yang menhijau ker, ermm kalu xpon maybe a "JENK" of cows and a "JENK" of buffalo lepak2 together. but when it come to this situation, my travel to come and work here is really weird sket kot? i think? 1st u akan jmp bukit2 yang indah tersergam and also the hutan kelapa sawit yang might be relax a bit ur otak for a while...then...u will move on to the saket jiwa dan raga nyer driving a "JENK" of myvi and a "JENK" of savvy tgh dok dog fight on the the road ermm... then the feels of tension and mcm2 lagi arise with the jammed traffic with a stupid scenario, i mean ok laa.. Malaysia orgnya sgt prihatin wlaupon xciden kat sbelah jln..yang sbelah lagi asyik dok slow n usha2 smp kekdg tu xciden..dah dua lane pon xciden n sume nak tengok... mcm nak tengok semut n kerengga melintas jalan.. sgt prihatin rakyat malaysia CAYALAHH...I LUV MALAYSIA :D

then when it comes to knowing, both of us mcm da lame sgt terkenal mcm popular la plak ayat "terkenal" tuh.. but its true! mmg mcm lama n i dont feel like we just meet... but its just 1st for us but in other way its kind of da serasi n da sebati dgn masing2 mcm hahaha xtau nk ckp camner.. it just like im glad for us..KEEPON ROCKIN BABY!!

p/s: haa da start merapu ikan kerapu da..da dpt tulih mcm2 bende nk tulih hahaha Kamu! forget the "angkasawan' shoes ok? love that shoes...and finally we got what we want rite? ;D

Again Left Leg

one leg stand
one leg walking
one leg balance it
one leg kicking the mattress
one leg is so helpful in this situation
one leg is for gas
one leg is for brake and clutch

its kinda horrific moment

one more leg sitting back
one more leg just ignore other leg
one more leg is swell like a big hot ballon
one more leg is been punished by me using "minyak panas hijau"

so hot and can merembeskan all the angin inside there

now its kinda ok and the swell kinda turn to normal size back
now i can drive back but a bit pain la ;)
thats why i can write today hahaha!!

p/s: arigatou for massage my leg yaa! you can be 'mak urut' tuh but cuak gak nak urut ngan you.. till now... this is public announcement: dont play futsal dgn sgt bersungguh2 kalu tak seliuh lagi teruk if retak or patah or lagi horror tercabut!! wuuu!! i da cuak da...

So long! How short!

so long keyboard...
so long monitor...
so long mousy...
so long speaker...

how short the time we need each other...
how short the time we know each other...

so long phone...
so long toilet...
so long pantry...
so long emergency stairs...

how short the time we've been conflicted
how short the time we talk each other

so long to happy voice
so long to anger voice
so long to flirting voice
so long to sad voice

how short the time for me to understand it
how short the time for me to get use to it

so long! how short! its kind of emotional situation that i feel right now!
sorry to all and thank you for accepting me in this department
so long! how short! life is about sacrificing all the bad to good and the good to bad, thats all i know the life to survive to live here!!

so long! how short! ;-)

p/s: waiting for the 10th Dec 07 to rebuilding a new road and i hope it much better than a highway... and kamu! thanks for your support back those days ya! :-)

AISHITERU!!!

I love the way you hold me
I love the way you care
I love the way you look at me
and how you're always there

I love the way you say 'i love you'
I love the way you smile
I love how you make me laugh
when we talk all night

I love the way you make me happy
I love the way we're true
I love the way you love me
but mostly that i love you.

The emotions & activities around me from 17th oct till now...

dizzy
disorinted
overdose
faint
chaotic
mess
fuss
begging
demanding
silence
loudness
talking
signing
stapling
print
stamping
rebel
sleepy
anger
jokes
daydream
head banging
love (you)
miss (you)

The important thing in me inside (office) here is WRITING the life WRITING the experience to be shared WRITING the truth WRITING to relief ~i am the writingwriter

"Far Away"

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing

p/s: like the lyric it so emotional (review back since the last post..biler pon da xingat da), the way he express it through the song is much much emotional + the arrangement of the song is awesome + moderate part is so nice when the melody is repeating through our head..enjoy it! from "Nickelback"

Outrages sound and melody on their "vacation"

its like a melody
its like a sequence of tone
the tempo sometimes in normal beat 4 by 4 sometimes it goes like 3 by 4
the loud the sound the hate i am
the more the sound the crazy i feel

its like happy holiday everybody
its like you sitting on a bench at hawaii island then suddenly...tsunami come
its like cold turn to hot

its like a melody
its like a sequence of tone
what is it?
where is it everybody?
its like 20 become 5

the sound again EMERGE from the handle
its like a box
so many kind of color variation on it
sometimes with stickers on it

the sound again and again joining together to sing in their language
but i know their language
and i understand it, other people understand it
i hate and i feel crazy of it
please someone, somebody

PICK UP THE PHONE PLEASE!!
EVERYBODY GONE TO THEIR "VACATION"
AND HAPPY WITHOUT ANY SOUND BECAUSE THEY ARE DEAF.. huhu!!ITS A PHONE.. ITS A TELEPHONE..huhu...

How I wanna ask for help if myself dont know it...

i dont know how to start and to say..
but it seems to bother my mind..
i dont know what is it..
it feel like i got to do something that can relief it..
seriously what is it that im thinking? feeling?
it was like jumble up + mixed up with i dont know what thing,
but back in the past i always feel like this,
but now suddenly it come to ruin myself,
probably maybe the stress and the tension in the working place or
maybe to much thinking of a problems or maybe because..
ARGGHH i dont know what is it!!
GOD.. please calm me down, i dont mad or angry to people today,
but i just dont feel like me today!!let me know myself with
my heart my soul and my body... :(

p/s: dont worry dear! i'll remember your words..

A day with a crazy hour till 3


today people seems to be nice to me maybe because I think they miss the crop hair man that always busying himself with work... i feel so ok today because of the environment actually its quite freezing here (can mutate me into a snowman cause snow da nk turun kat my office MY GOD!) and the people quite nice to me ;)...

there's one part that i think funny and true kot haha!! there's 1 my office mate said to me "weh mane ko pi smlm hah? ko gi dating ek

ngan awek ko?! yela..smlm pon kl org xramai so senang la bergerak kan *sambel ghenyeh2*" then i was said back to him "mane ade beb,aku xsihat laa smlm, aku agak demam + seseme sket tu psl laa aku xmai!!" then i plus my word more more "ape brg dating time weekdays beb?! org dating time weekend laa start jumaat, sabtu, ahad baru laa betul *dengan gaya kompoiden nye ayat tuh kuaq*" then,ok

this part is to remember, come 1 akak rerupenyer tengah pasang telinga heard my conversation with my mate, she said "wahh!romantik ko firdaus ek? akak ingat ko nih
ganas + rock rerupenyer ko nih romantik",then she plus "ala akak tau, org cam ko nih
mmg camtuh luar lain dalam lain,hahaha baru akak tau rupe2nye ko ni jiwang karat mcm awie dlm cite kpg pisang!" then i laugh out loud! so easy they call me like that...ok! i take that as a joke,its fine for me...selagi ia tak menjatuhkn my dignity...i have pride and also a stance to be followed! haha very funny la my office mate today, they just like 1 year didnt see me in the office haih! terharu2...

then, i rush to my work, in about 25 mins.. then come 1 more akak talking to 1 more akak, "eh! ko xpesan ap2 ke kat cik anuar tuh? kan die outstation kat srawak.." so, my ears like parabola satelite that catch every sound n frequency beyond any other satelite can..hahaha apekah? then continue 1 of the akak "aku ingat nak pesan pasu bunga laaa yang...blablabla" haih akaks talk! you know..then another 1"aku ingat nak pesan GAMBIR SARAWAK laaa...baru laa best lama skit" then i was like WHAT THE tuttut this akak order from mr anuar there. oh man!! then i suddenly, laugh in cover mode...so she caught me then she said "haaa tgk tuh firdaus tuh tau tuh psl GAMBIR SARAWAK mesti pernah gune *dalam style2 gurau gedik2*" then i said "mane de akak oi!! penah dengaq je laaa kan kat mesjid india tu kan bersepahm org jual apsal nk bli kat sane haih!" then dengan pantas nyer kene counter "sane baru pure n ori!!" OH MY GOD! ade gak akak2 mcm ni kt cni talking this kind of thing...uihhhh mereman
bulu roma ku mcm terjmp hantu lompat2 hahaha.. so i leave them with their hot
chat.. but every time that akak pass my cubicle she said "hah firdaus2 xsangka akak
ko nih ek" then she spoil my hepi day a bit i said "akak jgn la dok ckp camni tooloongg laa ok!!*ngan gaye yang tegas*"haha then she a bit blush laa kot.. too proud wuth her story about GAMBIR SARAWAK kasi sumbat mulut baru tau...:))

that is the weird and crazy day after i've been working here since october the 17th... i gotta laugh with all my heart te kuarkuar lepas abes keje ni WAHAHAHAA!!

p/s:mcm best je kamu tmpt kamu ckp tu, xper kalu sedap kite have a try ok ;)hepi reading yaa!!

Morning in a new day after resting one day

ohiogozaimasu! for me to feel better
ohiogozaimasu! for you to feel better
ohiogozaimasu! happy days for me today
ohiogozaimasu! happy days for you today
ohiogozaimasu! for you to make feel like this
ohiogozaimasu! for us!
ohiogozaimasu! aishiteru for all of my heart!!

working day in the morning is such a refresh activity like jogging in town with stressful road full with cars and motorcycle!!

URESHII!!

Because of "M" doesnt want to stuck in our mouth...

so, we gone crazy on the bus stop, laughing till people scared on us...
so, my left arm (finger) feel so light and its so light because of the impact on the steel chair then it crack and place safely in my pocket (got to cari GAM GAJAH)...
so, we found a new name of ghost that lived only at Antartica and similar like her cousin in Malaysia that have a fang, but in a different way of fang and the way to suck of the blood...
so, we feel so sad and anger to the stupid giler nak mampos punyer progol, jage lah progol2 diluar sane waltianak akan hisap darah ke ape ke tak kisah laa as long as you're dead and shouldnt suppose to live in this harmony world...
so, the "M" alphabet make our language into a kind of alien language not makhluk kaki yaa!!hamahamhama...

the "M" days gone wild and crazy for us ;-)

p/s:whats your program tonite? PINAKELADA nak? joms? humuhumuhumu

My Favourite to Strum

Which one will it be of this two?

Gibson SG

already got this one, but its a clone! but its okay if i have the original one right?! huhu..

Gibson Explorer

this one is kinda cool one! and im so adore to play it and jump with it!!

p/s: i want it both..huhu!! must saving! must saving!!

Colorful paper in my office

pick the yellow paper
compile it with detail paper
in a proper angle of height and witdh
then *KACHAAKK*, the sound of stappler emerge and breaking the noise of my Mp3
the hand of me right and left is no longer talking each other
except now in this moment, when they talking each other on the keyboard

after the stapple process finish, then the hard work of right hand begin to cramp
its all because of writing the numbers and the codes on the yellow paper
that yellow paper is a trouble maker that seems to make me arise the tension of boredom
today, the level was quite difficult even some might say it is just about the yelow paper, stapple and pen

give me a break! if i can i dont wanna see the yellow paper, but if i dont see the yellow i will be meet the green paper
what a colorful life of paper in my office
can you imagine it?

Ulser Go Away From Her!!

kamu! dont makan bende2 pedas cam 'tomyam' ek nanti saket lagi lidah kamu tuh. drink a lot of water yaa. if i can jd kecik mcm 'honey i shrunk the kids' i sure masuk dalam lidah kamu ngan lawan ngan sume2 makhluk2 ulser tuh.. cam iklan 'vitagen' tuh pakei sut angkasawan ala2 sheikh muzaffar shah *eh betul ke name die eja cam ni?* but i cant jd kecik cam tuh aiyark!! anyway take care ya ;) harap kamu cepat sembuh yaa...

Love you mom

Mom...is love...
Mummy....is love...
Mother...is love...
Mama...is love...
All words are same...
At mother...
Mother is same for love...
Love is same for mother...
Same with same...
With love...

p/s: suddenly I think about my mother at my cold office and i really really miss and love her... can't wait to go balik kampung this Raya Haji... love you mom!

Cool n Hot

memula sejuk bagai antartika sampai my head pun da nk naik pasif membeku mate pon bleh jd ice (ABC) lama gak xmkn ABC kan kan uwiuwiuwi!!... pastu skang ni panas lak bagaikan gurun sahara tak pun mcm kat egypt duduuk dalam piramid tu sambil pakai 10 lapis baju OR jaket bulu kambing biri-biri.. sooo hotttt!!!
lagi nak tambah hot my 1st cek tuk gaji bulan 10 xmasuk lagi, ni la masalah nye nih..adeih tolong laaa...adeh cakap kat blog pun, blog xleh help me kuarkan cek tu wakaka.. arini da la xlunch mkn kat umah je laa kene laa ikat perot jd cam waktu-waktu study dulu wahaha klaka2, keje da keje sen xmasyuk lagi arrggghhh tension nyer my head ni rase cam nk bom je tmpt ni... seb baek C4 xder yang ade just CIA and FBI jer cesh!!

but yesterday is kinda cool for me and ofcourse for you too isnt it? one-one-eleven will be the next feveret word for years and years ahead to come!! WATASHIHA URESHII.. OMAESAN, ARIGATOU GOZAIMASU from the bottom of my heart!!

Can..Cant

finally i say what i suppose to say,
finally i relieve of it,
finally i feel happy of it,
finally i struck with a million of questions that i dont know what is the true answer,
finally it gave me a chance to understand of me,
finally and surely im in a floating sky.. waiting to drop myself down from sky,
finally... whether im gonna survive or i will be explode like a smooth tomatos,
finally its me and its you in a word that i never said to others...

in the end... i just wait, listen and understand your answers... in the puzzled emotion of myself, can i? or cant i? ups and downs of my life!!

i try to puzzle the pieces of my brain that leading me to the answer

p/s: i dont know what to feel cause im so scared and im so dont know what to do here stuck in the office

Otak baru nak refresh akibat demam

Demam seharian memang ku rasakan seakan lumpuh
Tapi hari ini aku kembali beraksi (95%)...
Kembali ke tempat kerja yang penuh dengan kerja..
Yang bersepah-sepah macam nak kene panggil DBKL je,
MAK OI! terkejut aku di buatnyer,
Ada la akak ni kata ada "Mawi" perform kat bawah blok,
Menjerit-jerit cam anak dara! haih sabaq je laaa..
Semua akak2 dan makcik2 turun bawah nak tengok...
Mawi berjoget sambil nyayi... takpa laa tu hak diorang!
Diorang suke ape yang diorang nak,
Janji selagi diorang tak kacau aku, ok laa!!
Haih mana lak bos aku nih!?
Aku nak start key in data memerlukan authority card die,
Ni yang bosan ni dok kat kerusi sambil layan lagu..
Pastu berkhayal haha bukan layan pil khayal ok!!
Time keje pun sket lagi nk abes, pasni jumpa my bro...
Teman dia pi beli anak tikus kasi ular dia makan (BOA PYTHON)
Then pick up my sis kat school then off me to nilai...
Selamat hari isnin...

Omaesan oyobi Ware

I know we are meant to be
You know I am perfect for you
And I know you are perfect for me.

Never let me go,
My love for you is forever
This you already know.

I will always love you
Because when you came in my life
My feelings were brand new.

I know you are true
Because you are always near
And never make me feel blue.

You and I have been together for a long time
Maybe it is because I know you are the one for me
Since you never have left my mind.

You know how to make my day
Every night before I go to sleep
I ask the Lord for you to never leave me; as I pray.

I took a chance on us
I realized that I love you
And you I can always trust.

It will be you and me
Forever in my mind
I hope this you can see.

You are the person that can brighten my day
And for that
I always want you to stay.

Genap 1 tahun untuk aku

5 minit lagi menunjukan aku sudah mengenapkan satu lagi tahun untuk diri aku,
tapi ia berbeza dari tahun-tahun yang sudah... tahun lalu adalah memori tahun
sebelum itu adalah memori juga, namun satu pun tiada erti untuk aku meneruskan
nafas aku ini, aku bernafas hanyalah untuk aku dan untuk jiwaku saja... tiada apa,
tiada siapa, tiada benda, tiada aku didalam aku... hanyalah pedih dan luka yang
masih beku didalam, tiada siapa yang mengerti tentang jiwa hanyalah aku dan aku
disini seorang...

Aku pun kurang pasti apa yang aku nak post, hanya untuk menyatakan aku sudah genap
26 tahun... 26 tahun yang mungkin akan merubah aku, membentuk aku, menghargai aku,
mendalami aku dan pada 26 tahun ini aku merasakan sesuatu yang tidak pernah aku
rasakan selama ini...mungkinkah ia berlaku? mungkinkah ia terjadi? mungkinkah
ia terjawab segala persoalan aku selama ini? Ya! Ya! Ya! ia pasti akan terjadi! 26 tahun
akan membuka satu cerita yang baru untuk aku dan dia, cerita yang sama sekali berbeza
dari orang lain. cerita yang akan memberi keindahan, ketulusan dan perhatian... well,
its kinda late now, i better turn my brain n eyes off tomorrow ada ber bundle2 lagi work
nak kene siap... 26 of me, comes to gather all new fresh memory and life...
happy old day to me! satu, dua, tiga, *make a wish* yeay!yeay!yeay!

p/s: arigatou kamu ;-), anything let me know ok?

The journey of the writing writer continue...

Its been a long time i didnt continue my writing about the journey of my life. And its
kinda.. i found the path that i should go on and walking there without turning back,
without a doubt and anything that will block my path towards the light... the light that
i've been watching from far that im so admired on it and amazed on it. the light now
become more bright to lead me together inside the door that will end... end of my
journey of seeking and experience the pain and the cuts that i've been through.

When i watch the sky i can sense of it, the sense of existing of you, when my feet
touch the ground, i know i will stand still on it and of i hope we'll hold on tiht together
to make up something, i mean something special about the door that both of us will
open it. and we will make it through together with the light that you always carry
no matter where you go...

Thats all for tonight, and this is kind a weird writing to understand even i also
sometimes confuse about what i writing here hahaha!!! the writing writer has finally
come back to bleed his finger on a keyboard...

p/s: take care and have a nice day cant wait on this 7th, i'll try to make it... GAMBATTE!!!

Love is

Love is pure
Love is hope
Love is happiness
Love is trust
Love is loyalty
Love is faith
Love is kind
Love is beauty
Love is strength
Love is heaven
Love is forgiveness
Love is music

A NEW WORD FOR ME

"To help, A helper" its you!!

SO LONG SO LONG

a time to be missed
a moment to be missed
a memory to be missed
a breath to be missed
a vivid to be missed
a feeling to be missed
so long, so long

Anugerah Terindah Yang Pernah Kumiliki

aku baru jer abes tgk muvie freedom writers, kinda cool true story and aku sker giler ngan character yang Hillary Swank bawak iaitu Erin Gruwell.. respect gler kat dier yg mane tlah brani tuk mengajar stoden die yg agak gler prangai memasing, racial prejudice, mentality and psychology abuse, dimana stoden2 Erin ni lalui dan byk lagi aspek yg cube si Erin di bwat tuk prubahan stoden die dari negative to positive laahh... yang aku sker part die suh stoden die tulis dlm journal ape yg derang rase, from past till present anything yg derang rase nak tulis, so dengan itu stoden die dpt mengisahkan perjlnan hidup dan setiap kejadian baik atau buruk yg berlaku atas diri mereke sendiri. actually writing ni best, actually die dpt meluahkan isihati kite yg mana kalau kite nk ckp tu, mmg xterdaya kecuali dengan setiap abjad yg terjadinya perkataan, jika disimpan kat dlm tuh bahaye gak, coz it will make us more and more hurting the feeling inside pastu jadilah bende2 yg xsepatutnyer jadik.. ermm!

so, im take my time here to write what i wanna write about myself, my environment, my ups and downs and all the factors that impact myself to be like this... dalam sume post yg pernah aku post kan kat sini sumenyer datang dari lubuk hati aku sendiri, dari aku belajar menulis dlm diary hingga lah aku post kat dlm blog nih, it just a simple words but sometimes it really impact myself untill now... kire kebykan post kat dlm blog ni pon adalah hasil 3 tahun aku kat MMU. ape yang aku rasai dan ape yang aku lalui sume tuh adalah wasiat dan tinggalan tuk org2 yg bace blog aku nih.. kebykan nyer sume adalah berdasarkan emosi. haih skang da nak abes da kat MMU aku rindu kat sume bende2 yg aku lalui biler aku bace balik post2 aku yang lepas2 terase cam xnak berpisah pada saat tu, tp kite xberkuase nak bwat bende diluar jangkaan manusia, kite just keep on living and trying da best until we lost our breath... FYP pon settle already, BHM pon same gak lega rase nyer... Alhamdulillah!

teringat aku kat seseorg time2 gini, aiseh jiwangs la plak ahaks... ;)) aku nyalakan rokok sambil menulis ape yg aku nk cakap, saat2 biler aku bersame die aku rase best sangat, xder org lain best selain aku... bler aku kuar ngan die aku rase die adalah seseorg special tuk aku and aku la bodyguard die yang paling best and i will protect her no matter what, bler kuar aku mkn ngan die, aku slalu perhatikan mata dan mulut die aku tahu yang die ade something nk cakap, kadang2 bler aku pandang die sampei aku pon da terbang kemane2 tah le aku terbang ke Paris kots hahaaha... tp sebenarnya aku xtau camner nak ckp dan camner nk buat.. :| im just a total loser! tu yg slalu aku cakapkan kat diriku... oh man! i wish that she was mine, but somehow aku rase cam aku cuber tuk jauhkan diriku kat die sbab aku tau aku xbleh lakukan, why! why! hish! da pukul 6.10am aku still dok merapu menghaban kat dlm blog nih.. god! i wish that she know what is deep inside my heart rite now.. ishh sudah la tuh aku tetaplah aku begini, kamu tetaplah kamu begitu!

Farewell

I wish you farewell,
To new and better things,
No matter how hard it is,
Never give it up.
Reach for what you want,
And you'll soar into the sky.
So long, I bid you a farewell,
No matter how hard it may be to let you go.
I'll see you again,
whether you come to visit or it's in my memories.
Never forget those who love you,
for they are always there for you.
I'm here for you.
I wish you a farewell,
To a new and more exciting adventure.
Although there will be hard times,
Forget them and remember the good ones
You had here with your family and friends.
I'll love you always.
Farewell.

War vs. Normal

We get up in the morning to enjoy a lovely breakfast
We get up in the morning to escape the gunfire

We go and play
We go and hide

We run and play games with our friends
We run and hide, in a shelter with our friends

We have lunch with our families
We perform a cremation ritual to our families

We listen to the music on our MP3
We listen to the bloodshed outside our shelter

We have dinner in peace, and silence
We have dinner caution, and suspicion

We say goodnight, before going to sleep
We pray to god, for mercy, before going to sleep

Fantasi CINTA, dibumi realiti

Cinta itu banyak tafsirannya,
Cinta juga banyak konspirasi,
Dalam atau luar hati itu yang dikatakan cinta?
Cinta bagaikan jawapan yang mengejar soalan yang belum pasti dapat memintasnya,
Cinta adalah ilusi dalam keadaan realiti,
Namun kenapa harus kita menolak ia pergi?

Cinta datang dan cinta pergi,
Cinta adalah kamu bila dicintai,
Cinta adalah dia bila disanjungi,

Cinta itu kehidupan manusia yang waras,
Dengan cinta kita tidak akan terbabas,
Dari segala ranjau yang akan memusnahkan kita,
Iaitu benci...

p/s: tidak boleh melelapkan mata, walaupun pagi ini ada MUET... ARGGHHHH!!!

Life is what life is

Through all the ups, all the downs,
Some will be there, some can't be found.
If they won't care as they should, so be it.
This is life in the way that I wish to see it.

You can give your all, or you can try not.
When they decide to leave, what have you got?
You build it up, then it breaks away.
This is life in the way I see it today.

Days come and go, true hearts stay close.
Without happiness, love is an imitation at most.
You haven't stayed close, it's hard to love you,
This is life in a way that is sadly true.

To leave behind such a feeble mind,
forget it and pursue someone real.
This is my goal, and in time...
This will be life and the way that I feel.

Ignore me

hello! hello! hello there!
can anybody see me?
can anybody hear me?
or touch me?
where am i? some kind of fantasy space out here?
yuhuuu! am i exist? or shall i say,
im a tiny little dust flying around,

nothing can make u see, hear or touch me,
cause im useless!

Red and black till u lost your voice



My voice is gone, bcoz yesterday i had a great time cheering my team not "my team shebby ok" its red devil!! wah its so unpredictable when my voice gone like this, i gonna recover it before this 18th... or not, i will able to throw my voice to sing a song for "Gema". Anyway, today i have a jamming session i think today i will not standing near to the microphone laaa, coz gile nk nyayi...so today arab je laa yang melalak!! the main point is, its been a long time i didnt lost my voice but yesterday match so...so...so great! red devil forever... cayalah Ronaldo and the rest of mate!!

Love is...

Love is to stare
Love is to admire
Love is to care
Love is to desire
Love is to want
Love is to need
Love is divine.

Alone

Alone I drift away,
Alone I walk a thousand miles,
Alone I fall asleep,
Alone I stare at the sky,
Alone I sit under a tree,
Alone I cry.

Alone I dream of you,
Alone I hope and pray,
to God who is so merciful and powerful
to let me find my way.

Alone I drift away,
Alone I live today,
and alone I'll die someday.

p/s: I'm so alone...

Kerana dia adalah kamu

aku terpegun melihat dirimu tersenyum,
ia bagaikan menganjak diriku kembali kesitu,
namun, aku ingin menyatakannya
adakah aku adalah aku,
atau mungkin aku adalah bayangan tidurku?

selalu aku menyedari hidupku dengan memori
yang tidak pernah sama sekali luput dalam ingatan ini,
aku juga selalu didatangi dengan dejavu yang sama sekali
aku tidak pasti adakah ia benar, adakah itu pasti?
pasti untukku?!

aku terpegun bila kau ungkapkan kata-kata dari bibirmu,
ia bagaikan membawaku ke satu tempat mendengar kehebatan kicauan burung,
taktala kegembiraan menyelebungi kehadiranku,
namun, aku ingin menyatakannya
adakah dirimu benar-benar bersamaku,
atau aku sengaja menolak diriku untuk jatuh keseorangan,
didalam lubuk yang tidak akan pasti aku naik kembali

benarkah aku masih ada ruang untukmu?
atau aku hanya bermain dengan bayanganmu saja...

1st Round T.K.O

Finally the 1st round of FYP submission da anto!! lega tuh lega laa but somehow i dont feel so good about it... hah! now we moving towards the 2nd round of "boxing competition" this one got to be really hard to imagine in terms of mental and psychology illness, man! it should be done! hope i can grad on time, and i wish all of them a very goodluck... kepala pon da mantong this week i got to rush back home to settle a thing plus i've got no money because all of used for "war" haha nice terms!

p/s: nothing going well here especially my life... hate myself!!

Tired eyes with crucial strength to seek

all this weeks makes me busy all day long, but somehow i've got a little time for playing cards, dota and of course mamak laa... weeks of worlds hell dominating my atmosphere, fyp...fyp that is the word of tension, repetition working, mental illness, haha and many more symptoms that we all can see for this in coming deadline of the project... now, im blogging myself to release some stress that kept inside, whether i know i can see 'tuah' hahaha. my progression of my works is now down in too a lil bit of relaxing sket laaa... but for sure i got many stuff to settle it down!! so,thats all i think!! cant wait to sleep in peaceful and harmony moment...

p/s: good luck for your submission and hope you enjoy busying urself for the FYP!!

An audition becomes our Albarb's dream to...

Oh thank god Alhamdullilah our audition for GEMA 07 at MMU finally pass by giving us hope to perform at grand hall...(mak aih besonyer) so, our audition on last saturday is not reallt good la but we manage to perform well and to cover-up our mistake during the audition...mostly the technical part, when my guitar doesnt want to make a sound... it is all because the cable, (haih cable tuh kasik gue cuak gler)so anyway, whether my guitar skill is not perform well as i practice my back-up vocal is very..very helping me to cover the emptiness of the guitar sound... arab, hatim, mus and shuk perform well and the think that i remember that shuk is so feel of 'hukum karma' song until he over running the chord thats sound so pelik and when i stare at him automatically he mengelabah cari chord balik hahaha!! mus, played 'hukum karma' in so fast tempo whether in the pratice session he cant do the fast tempo and we all agree we play in a moderate tempo so, in audition he played in a fast tempo that surely he can beat Lars Ulrich hahaha gempak tuh... hatem, wahh he's so stim pale coz he got my fx that can make a cry baby sound and he's a great guitarist...arab, the man with humble image when it comes to praising him abut his vocal, he denied about our perception toward his vocal..but i think arab vocal is good but not good laaa to beat Abuar Zain kehkehkeh!!

and now we all struggling for our FYP but the show is in around the corner... wahh such a great moment to have and to enjoy while we can... the show is in 1st April if im not been mistaken... so, win or lose it doesnt matter now, cause the competitors also have a lots of potential to win, if we win waaaahhh it is a greatest memories laaa while we studying in MMU..

p/s: thanks for supporting me and the band and hope you will enjoy the song for finale 'sentuhan listrikmu' hehe.. and the song is dedicated to you hehehe ;) (ble tak?)

Could I Ever Leave You?


Could I ever leave you? Never. For
you are the air the fills me with the
breath of life and the energy that fuels
each day.

You are my laughter, my joy,
my reason for being. You are my hope,
my warmth on a cold winters night, and
the flowers that bloom in my heart.

You are my friend, my love...my life.
You are the liquid of life under a deserts
sun; my port in a storm and without you
there is but a barren wasteland of
nothingness, where laughter has died
and darkness and bitter howling winds
are forever.

Could I ever leave you. Not for all
eternity and one day thereafter, if
there be such a time.

Thinking of You

I think of you every night and day
In all I do and all I say
I think of you when I’m on the air
For your music I so like to share

The beat of your music speaks to me
It shows up in my rhymes as you can see
Not all but some have just the right beat
Read them all just take a seat

You inspire me in every way
Too keep on working at it every day
Sooner or later I’ll reach my dreams
And I have you to thank, so it seems

So thank you my friend for all your support
You are my stormy port
I look to you for my inspirations
For all of my creations

Everything that i want is you

im sorry because of my moves
im sorry because of my bad images
im sorry because of my reaction
im sorry to make you feel down like this
im sorry to make your heart break
i know that im so idiot to myself
i know that im so dumb to you
once again im sorry to make you tears going down on your cheeks
please forgive me... i begging this to you...
we'll start this all over again... without making you sad or cry...

p/s: mintak ampun yaaa! ;)

Alive Or Just Breathing?

sudah lama aku meninggalkan blog aku nih.. tanpa dibaca, tanpa diusik, tanpa dihayati. aku sendiri pun tak pasti, tapi apa yang boleh aku katakan ialah aku kembali kerana perkataan adalah kehidupan yang pasti! bebaru ni aku ada a lots of problem yang aku rasa sedih, putus asa, and many more negative impact on it... aku kesian kat family walaupun pada kawan2 aku mereka nampak aku ok, but aku try nak hide hanya kat blog ni je aku try tulis apa yang boleh aku rasakan... tekanan demi tekanan aku kene and ofcourse my famiy too.

aku harap Allah akan memberi kekuatan kepada kami semua utk carry on our life ni... dan menginsafkan mereka2 yang tidak tahu bertaubat demi memuaskan nafsu hasad dengki mereka terhadap kami.. aku sendiri pun binggung kat atas dunia ni macam2 hal yang diluar pemikiran manusia mampu dilakukan.. takper aku redha dan aku tawakal kepadaMu.. hanya dengan menulis perkataan aku ni kat blog akan meredakan sedikit masalah yg aku simpan selama ini yg aku rasa berat untuk dikatakan...

p/s: think the way it should...

S.F.A.W I hope...

last.. miss.. love.. memories.. life database(huh?)... the joy...

p/s: the promise of "S.F.A.W"

Hungry little love

why? why me? why not some other guys?
why? why should you up for it? why?
why me? *sigh* hell why?

A chat with depression

Look here.
Do you know who the hell I am?
I am no friend and am no lamb.
I am here to destroy you.
I am no friend.
I am the enemy.
Im the devil in disguise.

Im The devil in the darkness.
Im the warrior that destroys.

I am depression.
You will never be free.
I will be with you for ever.

So now do you know who I am?
I am deppression
Worse than the devil
I am the devil in disguise
So now be wise

p/s: i'm talking with it! and i'm seriously shocked now!

Alone in my own world

I sit here alone,
in this dark place.
My mind has gone crazy,
my heart's in a race.
I sit here alone,
with my thoughts gone mad.
I feel I'm insane,
my life's turned bad.
I sit here alone,
as people pass by.
I scream to be heard,
but can't and cry.
I sit here alone,
I'm all messed up.
I have no control,
It's time to give up.
I sit here alone,
I can't hold on.
I'm losing my grasp,
My sanity's gone.
I sit here alone,
My freedom is here,
The struggle is over,
I won't shed a tear.
I sit here alone,
I shall never see light.
I have only darkness,
In my own world tonight.

The life cycle of my emotions

Love leads to pain
Pain leads to hatred
Hatred leads to sorrow
Sorrow leads to despair
Despair leads to pleasure
Pleasure leads to happiness
Happiness leads to love
Love leads to pain

p/s: that is all about it, to feel what it shouldnt be feel.. is it okay? i hope so...

Plenty of anger

There is plenty of anger inside of me
It has to stop
Why is there so much anger inside of me?
My anger is part of my frustration
I have to control it now
My anger causes me plenty of trouble
There is plenty of anger inside of me
And what is anger do I know?
Anger is a strong feeling of displasure
It is a grief that I have inside of me
How can I control it?
What triggers my anger?
Can I recognize it?

Finished and Something to do

at last i finished my presentation today.. it was great to feel that im free now, just for now okayy! gotta practice my guitar cause today i got jamm session haih release all the pain and the suffering that i been through!

p/s: heart broken is just a simple kinda of pain that i always been through! knowing someone that i suppose to make me crazy and down all day long! so got to do sumthing better now... cheers guys :D

All sucked-up

empty already my ideas to write down the situation analysis + executive summary = web based! Gotta continue it tonite, or else im dead! wahh! i hope guys also do what you suppose to do erk! gotta motivated myself to finish up this task before thursday... please god give me some strength to face all that happen to me lately...

LOSER

yet still into the word of loser...ok! please somebody tell me that im not the one of it! i cant feel the way it is?!

p/s: dont ask, dont bother, im still like s***!

Again with some agony situation

play arround with words and smile
sometimes can make us a lil' bit of distracting
toward something that we are ahead
lie, hate, its all about to be change into pretending matters
whether it is such a nonsense action been taken
trust, love, its all the bottom line here whether you want it
or you lose it, try not to wanting it to be lose
here, there, and every inch on the earth that you step
i will hear for it, whether you dont want me to hear it
i will never see you again in the next resurrection
so lie, hate, trust and love will be my next companion
like it or hate it, it shall be one of us!
welcome to my next journey into the ages of agony
that always welcoming me into it and jailed me in it!
lights will be never be seen again when i enter it...
welcome home cj,and its a home for you to breakout!
through your journey...

emo in the morning

am i such a fool?
or maybe im such an idiot?
downing myself with the words that make me such a broken heart people
why? should i live in the world of loser?
can i be like those people that always in free and been loved?
i like this! whether deep inside i know, i much more than this
10,11,12 whatever it that im always be like im used to be
such ashame! such a loser, what should it takes to be something to be mine
the quiet things that no one ever know except me and god

p/s:such a crap post i posted today right? nevermind i write what i feel about it :(

CLASH OF THE TITANS

so its a draw! hmm its much more better if we won the game! but still 3 points leading! hehehe... great match and Glory to Red Devilians!!

THANK YOU

thank you, amy i really love that t-shirt...
kinda nice design with the flying tiger...wakaka cute!
thank you again for remembering my birthday!!
i love it and i like it and im speechless!!
only a word of "THANK YOU" that really mean how deep it is!


p/s: 1st ever girl that give me a present for my birthday (amy)
next year nak lagi ble?? hehe kidding...

T-E-N-N-I-S

haha! a good class from MR LEE, our tennis sifu! so otai you know... today practice was damn good, we were been told be ply half court and practice to hit the ball, but one of my friend, wahwahwah he hit the ball like hes playing full court! wahwahwah not that all he claim himself as roger federer kahkahkah! but its ok la if he is federer so i am boris baker la! the otai one! we practice in about 20 to 30 min and its damn give me a really sweat like rainning.. but im gonna like it tennis class, at least i work up once in a week!haha! great tennis, and great people there (amoi2nyer) hahaha!!


p/s: one day, i will head-to-head with MR GHAZ aka SAMPRAS kots?? can i win it?

Time after time

so, after all im gone here now im back again... with a good holiday and very good life, i think?! erm, so my life again and again continue whats suppose it done, its like a routine everyday when i woke up! yesterday is 25 for me, next year 26...OMG im getting older and older but still cant reach what i suppose to reach, but anyway most of it i already archieve it. this blog i write it today using my new CPU that i bought it at low yatt where PCs thing might come cheaper than you thought... wahwahwah best gak quotation nihkan? "low yatt where PCs thing might come cheaper than you thought" hahaha! actually this new heart is for my final project that will make my head more and more pressure like hell! so, i made it to my final year studying at MMU and all those days i gonna miss it... and i should miss it really much the memories the anger the sadness and the happiest day there!

so, i like my life but sometimes i gotta pretend to like it and i know that i hate it... i gotta admit it that i dont like people see me in other way! hrmm! bout my final project proposal hahha thats kinda playing arround my head right now, MAN 3 proposal!!! sound like easy but its hell hard MAN!!! haha you what last 2 trimester i take japs language but i couldnt take it so i drop it and for this trimester surely i gotta take subject more to sports, i mean badminton! hahha lame gler xmaen badminton dowh!! i heard that badminton physical fitness is the most toughest test u gonna through... but i will whether i know my knee background is not perfect enough to play! hahaha i hope my knee will stick together wawkaka...

owhh well im getting older and older and im proud of it cause the younger days make me grow stronger and stronger and make me believe that i have something in my life that i should let it go to have it! so, till we meet again and for those is reading my blog i love you and i will love you no matter where you are, cause i believe in it!

p/s: me old...me old...me old...me old...me old...