My Perfect World
bright shining lights
smiling faces
laughter
music
peace and love
timeless space
deep midnight conversation
meaningless chat
my friends close by
to need and be needed
to help and be helped
to listen
my perfect world
exists in me
you're welcome to visit
to stay
pull up a chair
and together
we can see it through
p/s: thank you all!
Sunday, September 24, 2006
Friday, September 22, 2006
I Am Someone
I am someone
I walked past a dead face
even though the person was alive
I saw my eyes in the mirror
and cried at the sight
I looked at a person I didn't know
and I met a friend
I got heads to turn
when I walked past
I learned a lot about myself
when I lost a new friend
I cried every tear in my body
when I thought about love
I got hit bad
then got back in the ring
I climbed a mountain of rocks
and saw an eagle fly over- head
I heard terrible things about myself
when no one thought I was listening
I realized I was strong
when I didn't cry when it hurt
I found out who I was
when I was with someone else
I thought I was lost forever
when a friend found me
I held a life in my hand
and it was my own
I was a pawn in someone else's game
so I surrendered to a brook
I walked the fine line between surviving
and not wanting to survive
I still am
I am someone
I am someone
I walked past a dead face
even though the person was alive
I saw my eyes in the mirror
and cried at the sight
I looked at a person I didn't know
and I met a friend
I got heads to turn
when I walked past
I learned a lot about myself
when I lost a new friend
I cried every tear in my body
when I thought about love
I got hit bad
then got back in the ring
I climbed a mountain of rocks
and saw an eagle fly over- head
I heard terrible things about myself
when no one thought I was listening
I realized I was strong
when I didn't cry when it hurt
I found out who I was
when I was with someone else
I thought I was lost forever
when a friend found me
I held a life in my hand
and it was my own
I was a pawn in someone else's game
so I surrendered to a brook
I walked the fine line between surviving
and not wanting to survive
I still am
I am someone
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Last Friday
at office we (me & shuk) got this new task that really off our majoring studies, want to know what? we got to create one theme song for our company's animation cartoon "cingkus the blues" haha guest what, we playing blues guitar riff and MAN i really dont familiar with blues guitar riff, so we develop a simple kind of melodic riff that suit with the lyric... actually it is not a pure blues we played but combine with rock n' roll riff that really twist your leg arround, hahaha...
then after tired with no more ideas to pour in the bowl, im off my way back home, then suddenly my friend ask me to join their futsal team cause they shorts of player haha then i think back! this past 2 weeks i didnt get a chance to make myself sweat, so its OK for me to join them... STARBUCK klcc vs STARBUCK bb... man i can feel the painful muscle after i woke up this morning! but the game was really cool everybody enjoy and have a good sweat! but today its a really sad day for me cause i got cold and some flu haih cannot go anywhere then i just put my ass down in my house for a good relaxing saturday...
p/s: run rabbit run!
at office we (me & shuk) got this new task that really off our majoring studies, want to know what? we got to create one theme song for our company's animation cartoon "cingkus the blues" haha guest what, we playing blues guitar riff and MAN i really dont familiar with blues guitar riff, so we develop a simple kind of melodic riff that suit with the lyric... actually it is not a pure blues we played but combine with rock n' roll riff that really twist your leg arround, hahaha...
then after tired with no more ideas to pour in the bowl, im off my way back home, then suddenly my friend ask me to join their futsal team cause they shorts of player haha then i think back! this past 2 weeks i didnt get a chance to make myself sweat, so its OK for me to join them... STARBUCK klcc vs STARBUCK bb... man i can feel the painful muscle after i woke up this morning! but the game was really cool everybody enjoy and have a good sweat! but today its a really sad day for me cause i got cold and some flu haih cannot go anywhere then i just put my ass down in my house for a good relaxing saturday...
p/s: run rabbit run!
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Long time no see the words dancing
its hard for me to write everything in everyday, sometimes in your journey you always in hurry and forget to do what suppose to do! like me, sometimes when i wanna write it down i feel my finger no longer got a bone hekhekhek... in a short terms "lazy" kehkehkeh! so, bebaru nih i heard that my friend's blog kene delete! "artisatwerk.blogspot.com" who the hell is deleting her blog huh? haiyaa common laa brother ke sister ke i dont care la, but its a private thing and you should respect it! if you love to read just read it but if you hate just leave it but dont dont do such thing ar... grow up please!! so anyway dee, keep on writing cause the writing makes you construct your journey to where you want!
man i got 2more weeks to go! lagi nak abes intern lagi lah banyak job2 yg kene settle kan! nah common give us a break please, ramadhan is near so give la some relaxing job, lagipon da nak abes my idea got kering cause the monitor sucked up all my idea haih! so, i found nothing to write right now cause my journey stopped for a while and i got to be alone with my words and myself!
p/s: till we meet again!
its hard for me to write everything in everyday, sometimes in your journey you always in hurry and forget to do what suppose to do! like me, sometimes when i wanna write it down i feel my finger no longer got a bone hekhekhek... in a short terms "lazy" kehkehkeh! so, bebaru nih i heard that my friend's blog kene delete! "artisatwerk.blogspot.com" who the hell is deleting her blog huh? haiyaa common laa brother ke sister ke i dont care la, but its a private thing and you should respect it! if you love to read just read it but if you hate just leave it but dont dont do such thing ar... grow up please!! so anyway dee, keep on writing cause the writing makes you construct your journey to where you want!
man i got 2more weeks to go! lagi nak abes intern lagi lah banyak job2 yg kene settle kan! nah common give us a break please, ramadhan is near so give la some relaxing job, lagipon da nak abes my idea got kering cause the monitor sucked up all my idea haih! so, i found nothing to write right now cause my journey stopped for a while and i got to be alone with my words and myself!
p/s: till we meet again!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
The worst day ever
erm today im not going to my office cause of the weird things happen to me! for 1 whole day i my foot doesnt touch the world outside my house because of it. wanna know what, my eyes... something happen to it, OMG my eyes "bengkak" after i woke up in the morning... its a nightmare i look myself to the mirror and all i can see that my eyes looks like the boxers that bengkak after fighting... hah! no way i can go outside with people looking at me like that, no way! it is like an alien from outer space man! for one whole day i tried to figure out why or from where that i get bengkak! ermm maybe, when i sleep some dirty insect bite my eyes kot, or maybe my cat, ermm it cant be my cat! maybe because the allergic kots... i dont have any allergic to most foods, udang i can eat, sotong also! ermm i think it probably cause of that dirty insect la kot, but i dont know what kind of insect that really bite my eyes... i put minyak gamat on it and also ice to reduce that bengkak huiiyooo like mike tyson owhhh!!! no i can feel some ichy2 laaa... i hope tommorow it will be okay la...
p/s: for Gitv people sorry cant go to office la! nnt korang bahan aku waahhakaka... aku xdtg pon aku dok umah jer kuar nnt pon kene bahan jer baek dok umah.
erm today im not going to my office cause of the weird things happen to me! for 1 whole day i my foot doesnt touch the world outside my house because of it. wanna know what, my eyes... something happen to it, OMG my eyes "bengkak" after i woke up in the morning... its a nightmare i look myself to the mirror and all i can see that my eyes looks like the boxers that bengkak after fighting... hah! no way i can go outside with people looking at me like that, no way! it is like an alien from outer space man! for one whole day i tried to figure out why or from where that i get bengkak! ermm maybe, when i sleep some dirty insect bite my eyes kot, or maybe my cat, ermm it cant be my cat! maybe because the allergic kots... i dont have any allergic to most foods, udang i can eat, sotong also! ermm i think it probably cause of that dirty insect la kot, but i dont know what kind of insect that really bite my eyes... i put minyak gamat on it and also ice to reduce that bengkak huiiyooo like mike tyson owhhh!!! no i can feel some ichy2 laaa... i hope tommorow it will be okay la...
p/s: for Gitv people sorry cant go to office la! nnt korang bahan aku waahhakaka... aku xdtg pon aku dok umah jer kuar nnt pon kene bahan jer baek dok umah.
Monday, September 04, 2006
The Journey
watching you sleep in cold dark night with tears fall to your pillow
im flying to watch you, see you evertimes i miss you
when im back to my body i saw myself sleeping with bleeding tears and the cuts in my arms was almost bring me to hell
but im still sleeping in dark cold night
im so afraid of the gloaming moment when the time i return to myself
what happen to you? will the tears stop coming off your pillow? is it hurt?
back then, im almost blind and feel the pain that killed the hatred for a second
would you join me to share the tears? can we walk together again? or maybe i just like to be a flying me to watch you over and over again...
watching you sleep in cold dark night with tears fall to your pillow
im flying to watch you, see you evertimes i miss you
when im back to my body i saw myself sleeping with bleeding tears and the cuts in my arms was almost bring me to hell
but im still sleeping in dark cold night
im so afraid of the gloaming moment when the time i return to myself
what happen to you? will the tears stop coming off your pillow? is it hurt?
back then, im almost blind and feel the pain that killed the hatred for a second
would you join me to share the tears? can we walk together again? or maybe i just like to be a flying me to watch you over and over again...
Saturday, September 02, 2006
The Amory Wars
"Every creator painfully experiences the chasm between his inner vision and its ultimate expression"
in my journey to find a lights, i stopped... and the barrier looks like playing tricks and show some back flip that somehow i impressed of it. the walk the talk the act the emotion is like familiar to me, the kindness of mine been questioned. by the ugly barrier.im stunt with it and so why me? among all the living things there, why shouldnt you ask somebody else, they just ignored it except me that willing to stop and carefuly think about it. should i talk back? maybe i should, to let the barrier continue my journey that i always wanted. then i say yes, im kind a guy that full of kindness, but sometimes i didnt realie that the kindness of mine been ri off because of the stupidity that i dwell in it.
im so stupid to understand the concept of life, but its okay for me i know that not what i meant for my kindness. can i pass through? nop, not enough to make me do so! with all my rusty memories flashed back... im in a black holes! without any reason i open my eyes back, so what do u think about that? the barrier looks like got a hypnotize things to make people go back to pass, to refresh the memories that is never ever will be polish. i shock and amaze! then i say what did i do to deserve this? i've lost it and to find it i got to re-do my false... am i false to you? right, sy the barrier you may pass me but in your journey try to remember the things that you've been through and try to redo it...if not, you will never find the lights whether you know you are so close to it. thanks and i will do so... when im continue my walking i look back to the annoying barrier, and i can see the eyes of sadness and cried, the barrier is me and he give some words to me to learn and learn until im not a liar to myself again and always you'll be my favourite... in the searching of lights that live in the happy world of fantasy.
"Every creator painfully experiences the chasm between his inner vision and its ultimate expression"
in my journey to find a lights, i stopped... and the barrier looks like playing tricks and show some back flip that somehow i impressed of it. the walk the talk the act the emotion is like familiar to me, the kindness of mine been questioned. by the ugly barrier.im stunt with it and so why me? among all the living things there, why shouldnt you ask somebody else, they just ignored it except me that willing to stop and carefuly think about it. should i talk back? maybe i should, to let the barrier continue my journey that i always wanted. then i say yes, im kind a guy that full of kindness, but sometimes i didnt realie that the kindness of mine been ri off because of the stupidity that i dwell in it.
im so stupid to understand the concept of life, but its okay for me i know that not what i meant for my kindness. can i pass through? nop, not enough to make me do so! with all my rusty memories flashed back... im in a black holes! without any reason i open my eyes back, so what do u think about that? the barrier looks like got a hypnotize things to make people go back to pass, to refresh the memories that is never ever will be polish. i shock and amaze! then i say what did i do to deserve this? i've lost it and to find it i got to re-do my false... am i false to you? right, sy the barrier you may pass me but in your journey try to remember the things that you've been through and try to redo it...if not, you will never find the lights whether you know you are so close to it. thanks and i will do so... when im continue my walking i look back to the annoying barrier, and i can see the eyes of sadness and cried, the barrier is me and he give some words to me to learn and learn until im not a liar to myself again and always you'll be my favourite... in the searching of lights that live in the happy world of fantasy.
Friday, September 01, 2006
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Komunikasi yang bersepah dan amat tragis
p/s: diary of the serial me... of all our love & hate, gambatte kudasai everybody!!!
benggong benggong jerit sorang sorang
sampai anak tekak berdarah, tapi itu la realiti kehidupan saorang manusia
kalau tak angin manakan pokok bergoyang kan?
jerit dan memekak siang malam pagi suboh tak langsung rasa haus
hmm rasa rasanya ini bukan lagi manusia tapi... entahlah
nak cakap takut laen lak jadi, susah laks tapi camne skali pun kene gak la tahan
suare suare tuh suare yang kenkadang membuatkan aku cuak...
haih arini gua tulis blog gune base pasar mixed2 lagik, gler ar lame xbuwat
ala suare tuh ada lagi la, suare tuh makin kuat lak cesh...
kalu camni kene la gua shut down pc pastu sweet dream ar jawab nyer,
ingat nak layan movie jap citer ocean 11 & 12 tapi tengok ar camner; kalu situasi
da okay layan ar
adakah aku nih saorang outsider kat luar umah mahupun bila kengkawan
aku tengok aku?
tah ler outsider pun outsider la janji aku bleh wat ape yang aku nak kan...
tak gunenyer kalu life nih asyik dok tengok orang jer diri sendiri pon tak tertengok,
so reramai la kite tengok diri sendiri camner, kalu ok tuh oret la but if not,
you probably one of that voices that i heard...
sampai anak tekak berdarah, tapi itu la realiti kehidupan saorang manusia
kalau tak angin manakan pokok bergoyang kan?
jerit dan memekak siang malam pagi suboh tak langsung rasa haus
hmm rasa rasanya ini bukan lagi manusia tapi... entahlah
nak cakap takut laen lak jadi, susah laks tapi camne skali pun kene gak la tahan
suare suare tuh suare yang kenkadang membuatkan aku cuak...
haih arini gua tulis blog gune base pasar mixed2 lagik, gler ar lame xbuwat
ala suare tuh ada lagi la, suare tuh makin kuat lak cesh...
kalu camni kene la gua shut down pc pastu sweet dream ar jawab nyer,
ingat nak layan movie jap citer ocean 11 & 12 tapi tengok ar camner; kalu situasi
da okay layan ar
adakah aku nih saorang outsider kat luar umah mahupun bila kengkawan
aku tengok aku?
tah ler outsider pun outsider la janji aku bleh wat ape yang aku nak kan...
tak gunenyer kalu life nih asyik dok tengok orang jer diri sendiri pon tak tertengok,
so reramai la kite tengok diri sendiri camner, kalu ok tuh oret la but if not,
you probably one of that voices that i heard...
p/s: diary of the serial me... of all our love & hate, gambatte kudasai everybody!!!
Monday, August 28, 2006
Destiny
speak up, stand up
drink up, eat up
everything that i do is only to fulfill my destiny
the destiny that never be the last journey
owh yes i did it, and i done it again
blind and never see it
deaf never ever couldnt hear
im paralyzed to continue my journey to there
no one hear it and no one see it
just me just myself to dream the dream that i wanted
its hell here... need some reflection from a mirror to see me there;
or else im still holding the letter of L
to be understand and wanted to be understanding is quite complicated after all
i do what i do
i speak up, i stand up, i drink up and i eat up... my destiny
speak up, stand up
drink up, eat up
everything that i do is only to fulfill my destiny
the destiny that never be the last journey
owh yes i did it, and i done it again
blind and never see it
deaf never ever couldnt hear
im paralyzed to continue my journey to there
no one hear it and no one see it
just me just myself to dream the dream that i wanted
its hell here... need some reflection from a mirror to see me there;
or else im still holding the letter of L
to be understand and wanted to be understanding is quite complicated after all
i do what i do
i speak up, i stand up, i drink up and i eat up... my destiny
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Sun to be change
im watching the sun change its color
whether it is an ordinary color... but for me it still change
change to be watch, change to be mad and change to be different
whether i know it is a normal sun... but for me its so different
the sun change spinning toward the unpredictable elements
all living things on this earth and the whole galaxy love you, praise you, admired at you, and you so adorable to me... whether you know or not, this words keep telling and running through the center of the skies
watching you to be different is probably a lost of past for me and probably to others too
whether i know you like to be it... and you still change from time to time to evolve
2pm its too hot to stand outside but i will stand to watch you... whether you dont see me
6pm its ok and not too hot but i love to see you fall down and so it goes
dont let my sun change cause i cant live without it and so to other living things
please sun remember me when im not seeing you anymore because of your eager for changes... or whether if you dont want it just let the past be the guardian for others life
sad to let you change happy to watch the old you... and of course the voice of little me wont hear you but i hope you can whether i know that you can and always...
im watching the sun change its color
whether it is an ordinary color... but for me it still change
change to be watch, change to be mad and change to be different
whether i know it is a normal sun... but for me its so different
the sun change spinning toward the unpredictable elements
all living things on this earth and the whole galaxy love you, praise you, admired at you, and you so adorable to me... whether you know or not, this words keep telling and running through the center of the skies
watching you to be different is probably a lost of past for me and probably to others too
whether i know you like to be it... and you still change from time to time to evolve
2pm its too hot to stand outside but i will stand to watch you... whether you dont see me
6pm its ok and not too hot but i love to see you fall down and so it goes
dont let my sun change cause i cant live without it and so to other living things
please sun remember me when im not seeing you anymore because of your eager for changes... or whether if you dont want it just let the past be the guardian for others life
sad to let you change happy to watch the old you... and of course the voice of little me wont hear you but i hope you can whether i know that you can and always...
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Crazy loner insomia
Im now feel so unstable with all the things im doing, yes i know im kinda straight person that doesnt seems to have any sense of voice to have say or to act normal when im been through it... the rhythm of myself is less to hold what i suppose to hold. i lost in the middle of darkness forest that drag me to dead! everybody seems to have a light to lead their way, but now im again with myself struggling alone and fighting with myself to dead until im not alone anymore. yeah, sure the world made me feel that im like not exist or visible to talk or act... people also dont look at me anymore cause im so useless and so outdated far from your future. only when i look through the sky i can see the cloud, the moon, the sun and the stars smiling at me and waving me a goodluck for the rest of my life. for what im here! only flying there when im fall asleep? yeah, i quite mumbling right now and those words keep me writing and writing to reveal the pain inside that no one shouldnt know about it...
And for all that i trust and for all that i believe now comes to the end whether it is already end. owh fuck, crazy to be me and when im feel uncomfortable i'll make some stupid thing that is really fucking hate to do! confius and depress for nothing and theres no healer that i could found it. sha la la la la... that is the sound of happy and freedom person that i know i cant get to it... the longer i stand the more stupid i am to be tired of it... so pretend to be the thing that im not suppose to be! is it? probably it is a way to open up the new me and the new hypocrite was been develop to cover all the tears and all sickness in my heart. shit! stop writing now or i'll punch you through the wall please! im begging you, my hand couldnt stop the feel "he" want to say but my heart cant stand to words the "his" trying to type... stop! stop it! enough torturing me with the grey and cold dull memories! i think i gonna punch it through wall right now!
Im now feel so unstable with all the things im doing, yes i know im kinda straight person that doesnt seems to have any sense of voice to have say or to act normal when im been through it... the rhythm of myself is less to hold what i suppose to hold. i lost in the middle of darkness forest that drag me to dead! everybody seems to have a light to lead their way, but now im again with myself struggling alone and fighting with myself to dead until im not alone anymore. yeah, sure the world made me feel that im like not exist or visible to talk or act... people also dont look at me anymore cause im so useless and so outdated far from your future. only when i look through the sky i can see the cloud, the moon, the sun and the stars smiling at me and waving me a goodluck for the rest of my life. for what im here! only flying there when im fall asleep? yeah, i quite mumbling right now and those words keep me writing and writing to reveal the pain inside that no one shouldnt know about it...
And for all that i trust and for all that i believe now comes to the end whether it is already end. owh fuck, crazy to be me and when im feel uncomfortable i'll make some stupid thing that is really fucking hate to do! confius and depress for nothing and theres no healer that i could found it. sha la la la la... that is the sound of happy and freedom person that i know i cant get to it... the longer i stand the more stupid i am to be tired of it... so pretend to be the thing that im not suppose to be! is it? probably it is a way to open up the new me and the new hypocrite was been develop to cover all the tears and all sickness in my heart. shit! stop writing now or i'll punch you through the wall please! im begging you, my hand couldnt stop the feel "he" want to say but my heart cant stand to words the "his" trying to type... stop! stop it! enough torturing me with the grey and cold dull memories! i think i gonna punch it through wall right now!
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Fantasy
All my life I had built up a fantasy
of the perfect girl.
Countless romance stories and fables
helped make that fantasy a reality in my mind.
Searching for that fantasy lead to many
disappointments.
Reality made it clear that there was no such girl.
And as the years went by, the fantasy started
to fade away - until I met you.
I had almost given up on the fantasy until
my fantasy became reality,
that reality became you.
All my life I had built up a fantasy
of the perfect girl.
Countless romance stories and fables
helped make that fantasy a reality in my mind.
Searching for that fantasy lead to many
disappointments.
Reality made it clear that there was no such girl.
And as the years went by, the fantasy started
to fade away - until I met you.
I had almost given up on the fantasy until
my fantasy became reality,
that reality became you.
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