alone while thinking bout you

in the darkest and silence place where im online is truly full of story when im here alone, stealing the coverage that im really thankful for his signal to keeps me connected in the digital form...here i am.. sitting with no chair just a light of my bathroom lights the darknest while im writting... you probably now happy with your agenda with your comrades and your sisters... im happy you make it, it done and successful event there... the sound of the tapping water drip flow my head, beside the sound of my music that keeps playing from 3.30 pm "co&ca"... im here alone with my writting down here faster beating my heart beat, write the feeling that i had today..

the stupid nightmare that i told you keeps repeating in my mind whether i know its a fake scenery and a fake us. i just keep asking to myself, why the devils hate us? and ofcourse the answer is because we are sons of adam thats why they always seek the chances to make us split into 2..in the nightmatre! sick of it! just now my neighbour K ask me to go out with him but until now he's disappear with any note left behind..m.i.a... i dont know whether you guys are reading my blog.. post by post... i hope my words gives you something that i dont really know what it is..

im shocked just now! my housemate bump his head onto the door to open the tight door haha... im just feel alone right now i wish i can join you guys to your party but i know its for girls only... man! i feel nothing to do to night normally i land myself to you to watch your beautiful hazel eyes.. im so admired your eyes..

now its 26th of july... cant wait to attend your sister's wedding and im driving back home.. i got something to looking for. its for my apparel 'things' the button and the 'kain pelikat' haha dont know what english word is.. its a gold baju melayu same like you, its cool enough we dressing in a same color! yeah! so till we meet again my digital journal i think i should do something right now..

and the important things is i miss your smile dear! and i love you! please hug me... please... sayang kamu!! take care!

weirdo off day

woke up like usually
but today was my off day
off day on a week days
its like weird and kinda bored actually
but its good also for those who wanna go for shopping
it a great time coz u wont bother with crowdy people passing by
and easy to step infront of the mall without any honking, shouting like a normal day for shopping that is weekend

so i drive my car to send my hyper and crazy housemate to kl sentral
wow! so fast i get there without any traffic jam and of course there's a small incident of traffic jam.. which is people who drive waiting for an ant to cross the road... i said " Ni la dia malaysia.. kalu ada xcident kat sebelah sume layan nak tgk, nak tgk xkisah pi laa park kat mana2 bayaq kat parking man tu rm 3.50 per hour then pi la tgk.. tp jgn tgk je tolong laa skali ker.." its like we from behind questioning what happen infront of us.. i said again " tunggu semut melintas bersama sama anak2 nya.. prihatin gak rakyat malaysia nih kan?" haha... then after that, i stop him at the suppose place he wanted to stop.. my eyki watch show me that now is 3pm something..ermm what shud i do yaa..my mind speed up to plan the last minute agenda.. but the road is getting busy and busy... suddenly i just passing by the place we also go.. when i pass the place my head its like a t.v or shall i said a dvd muvie that rewind all those memories we had back then.. such as at the bus stand near bukit bintang where.. i accidently broke my ring + we be like homeless people laughing out loud there.. it was fun to be with you... ;-) then i pass by the pertama complex foodcourt where we break our fast there..actually xmakan pon just minum air then bukak kat nasik ayam bukit bintang tuh yeahh!! its a golden moment for me actully.. there's a lot more place i passing by but this is the recall one that i can share.
then after a boring and memorable drive at kl i straight away heading back home, but i feel thristy.. i said to myself.."baik lepak jap craven or "caravan" ada la org tuh ckp)minum2 kat sana.. after i land my butt at the wooden chair i ordered my beverage... then i saw this guy beside my table, from the beginning of my walking to my table he's looking at me.. do i know him? ermm..nahhh!! not kot.. maybe he thinks im the one of "ahli fikir" member..haha..
then, i take it look while im think who was him.. i said man!! he's a front man of pretty ugly band.. he sat there by himself with a glass of tea and an empty page book.. wahh! i said! he probably wanna wrote his new song here.. with all the kerut2 on his dahi, writting the word that i didnt know what it is.. of course i dont know.. nak tau tunggu album kuaq laa, tu yang aku bajet die akan cakap kalu aku tegur die hahaaha... i sit there for almost an hour and a half watching him seriuosly writting.. i wish i brought my book too.. in that range of time i create my words to her because maybe i cannot stand to see someone writting beside me, im turn to be a type writer that automatically want to write a letters to create a words..

my word that i gave her sound like this...


love its just a word to say bout the feeling toward someone or something,
love its just a feeling that we know we are exist in this world,
love its just a present that ensure us not to be alone,
love its just a situation that create harmony surrounding,
love its just bout how we express our touching heart toward someone,

love is to appreciate, trust, honest, learn, care...
love for me is to love you more until im gone...

its just a word from my heart to you...


wahh its so dramatically for me to write it, it just comes naturally inside wheteher the grammar sound horrible.. but im trying to write it down... now im online at my kitchen using wireless coverage that escape from the people who use it.. and i as malaysian citizen fully utilize the thing to write my word inside here... man! it feels good when im write..

p/s: i love you dear!!

the simple effect counting

1..2..3..
never wanted to see you been hurt again
1..2..3..
i dont want you to feel down again
1..2..3..
why should the re-existing makes me so protective
1..2..3..
again i will never let someone hurt you agin
i mean no one!! no one will hurt your feeling cause im your bodyguard
1..2..3..
still counting until it stop.. and stop hurt you and make you down
1..2..3..
this is a counting for me to detonate my explosive, to whom it suppose to be
1..2..3..
i will take care of you from the nasty little crap
1..2..3..
it will explode if someone pull the trigger

and of course
1..2..3..

my love explode like a bomb of hapiness inside
1..2..3..
I love you dear!!

im been mosaic my life by my own

nothing much... almost 1 whole day i didnt eat.. from bfast, lunch, and maybe dinner and of course supper.. my story i edited about this guy kene 'reman' imigresen has been released.. and the most important thing is i mosaic his face.. yeay!! cool yo! perhaps i couldnt see her tonite hopefully tomorrow we have a time to see each other.. i feel so alone right now, my housemate gone to johor and also goes to my neighbour m.i.a.. im missed her already, hope she will feel the same like me.. life goes on no matter what i try to alter it and it still move on and on. and its good! but when it comes a time when i didnt see her, i felt so alone and so empty... i ate alone, i sang alone, and of course i talk alone...

GOD! am i really missed her? YEAH! I AM!! hope to see you.. but if not in reality please appear urself in my dreams... i love you dear.. i mosaic myself in this very little world.. and i learn how hard it be for me to feel missing the one i love... but im not mosaic myself in terms of my life.. and it just for awhile... dear!! i hope ur heart will listen what im trying to say and i feel right now... and i hope u are dear!!

after my shift is over i will get some food.. im so damn hungry.. its like im a somalian people.. huh?! anyway dear.. hope u r reading this!! i LOVE YOU and i MISS YOU dear!!

p/s: I love You...

Life

Life is like a song
When we are happy
the life sings a happy song

When we are sad
the life sings a sad song

Life is like a song

It just tune to the
music which you turn on

Life is like a song

It shows all the
High notes and low notes
in your way

Life is like a song

Even after having
a hectic life like a rock song

It only and always
gives a peace of mind

Because the words
of the song are
of your own

Life is like a song

p/s: i love music of you dear...

I love…

I love your hair
I love your eyes
I love your voice
I love every thing about you

I love the cute way you dress
I love your cricked smile
I love your dimples
I love every thing about you

I love the ring you always wear
I love the color of your hair
I love your height
I love every thing about you

I love your kindness
I love your love for everything
I love every thing about you
I love you

Story After Digest

yesterday, perhaps sadness take her away from me..why?
damn sad crossing across a word out through my mouth..
what should i do to wash away the sadness that you been through..
it feels like i am to un balance to make you feels like that..
myself, also reflect toward your face that brought me into the darkest place..called sadness..
forgive me.. if i'll make you feel this way..
the more it live inside, the more deadly it will eat us slowly till..death..
im feels so bad to you.. hope the sadness fade away and vanish through out the air that we inhale the life of hapiness inside our lungs...

no more sad days...just happy time!
no more bad days.. just a good time!
live our life together we share to create the path that we've made all this journey..
we believe on our words to love as one and let the devil's feel play out of our mind.. without entering the inside of our mind..

forgive me..if i doing wrong
forgive me..if i make you sad..
forgive me dear.. i love you..

p/s: somewhere in ampang writting with the noisy music all around me... digest my words slowly... aishiteru!

we found it se7enTH

HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
hope we will be together forever
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
the number bond us till now
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
im whole with u
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
u always make me feel happy
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
i hope that u happy with me
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
all our memories is already locked inside here
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
may our love last long
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
happy, sad, laugh, here i am beside u to talk to & to share your secret
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
waiting for the next eight
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
thanks for loving me so deep like this
HAPPY SEVENth DEAR...
*hugs*

AISHITERU..dear!

UPDATE WITH A LITTLE WORDS FROM ME

its been a long time i didnt update my e-paper... or shall i say my e-journal hehe.. thanks for those who like to read about my life line whether i didnt notice it.. its like im a subject to be focus here..

im working now at bernama tv as editor, its fun, its tough, its everthing that u doesnt wanna know.. man!! i dont know what to say here, coz its been awhile i didnt bleed my finger on a keyboard here, my head stuck without word to compile it here...

all i wanna say is im happy to be with you, and we shall move ourselves toward the door that we create to live there forever.. today is 10.. tomorrow is 11.. you know that i love you so much, my words here relate my words out there... im hope you happy to be with me for all this time.. no others can take it away you from me... i will be your best and your ultimate bf ever dear!! happy ichi ichi juchi tomorrow... happy to love you day by day!!

p/s: i love you...

COLDER or COOLER like chris koko

here, im lepak at her office kat BU MP...haha nice short form kan? mmg laa sangat cold and cool tempat nih. nice place, nice corridor, nice tolet and sume nice laa.. kinda long time xupdate blog, hari ni kene jadik bibik tulih blog. haha leh la camtuh kan :) pasni ingat nak tennis lak sbb that girl nk kasi _ _ _ _ huhu so, arini kene laa main sungguh2 GAMBATTE!! adeh lapa la plak perot nih...sat g nk bersukan la plak kan..huhu~ so thats all kot i just want to update my e-journey kat sini.. nanti la kalu dah ade time yang betol baru la sedap nak berpuitis harharhar..

p/s: _ _ _ _ _ _ kamu!! thats all stuck in my head now.. ;)

Write in urgency of dateline

at last i got a chance for me to write a bit, in the early dawn in about 4:22am... they all sleep and taking for a rest but i couldnt do that because of 'penangan' tongkat ali coffee in my pantry... i feel tired but i cant afford to rest, my hand, my brain, my eyes couldnt shut off even though my eyes turns to red. a bit itchy but i cant rub it up because i hold your words ;)... saturday, sunday, monday is busy for me with this new people in my new area which is publication. date line is near, but somehow we short off hands here... but i'll try my best to meet the date line if not... i dont know what to say and to act, whether i have a plenty of work i got to be finish i still want to write it here. it feels like im so alone without writing because i know you always want to read every words in type in here...and im appreciate it thanks.
hah! even though i ate nasik lemak with you, the power of the 'lemak' doesnt seems to make me fall asleep, but the nasi lemak there very very layan and satisfaction guarantee ;) ebtoi tak kamu? hehe.. cant wait to watch movie with you tonight, the movie that will make my eyes close...not because i tired want to sleep it is just because suspen and terkejut2...hahaha! and im so thankful to you for letting me use your stuff for me to camping here at my very office... but now i feel seram2 sejuk gak tgh taip2 nih... i hope its ok la. thats all i think i want to write cause my head is thinking about other thing..the thing that i dont, whether we can finish the job... GAMBATTE KUDASAI CJ! (bagi semangat kat diri sendiri huhuhu) KAMIKAZE!!!

p/s: kamu! you are special to me!!! because you are my girlfriend 'merangkap' advisor, doktor, motivater, suppa-hero and byk lagik huhu~ i like it ;)

Miss to blog

i doesnt really have much time to write here today, cause a lot of stuff here is mess and i got to re-arrange it. but here is the word or anything that i remember past this couple of days... :D

1) MAN-ster
2) again i am SCRUBS and ESTRANGED huhu
3) anakanda (just now)
4) the cute hand monster from under the bed
5) dizzy and throw up
6) i made a hot tea (KS-version)
7) the satisfaction thing
8) haha almost forgot about it, EBTOI!
9) you such a kind person (word from me)
10) lets dinner tonight
11) ok la kasi fair... TATATUsila ok ekekekekek...

thats all i can list out and im short of time right now and i gtg SAYONARA...

this heart tempos

this heart tempos
only cause of you

this heart tempos
just to know its true

this heart tempos
like a love i cant control

this heart tempos
to let everybody know

this heart tempos
when i see your smile

this heart tempos
just before i dial

this heart tempos
i hope you feel the same

this heart tempos
cause my heart is where i write your name

p/s: dug dag dug dag dug dag *triplet-kan tempo itu

owner of the cute eyes

your eyes is a healer to me
its make yourself to look inside and outside of me
your eyes is picture for me
its makes myself always stare into it
your eyes is brown color
the color that relaxing my eyes when im look at you
your eyes so crystal water
that you are an innocence person
your eyes is sharp and focus
i like when you stare at something and it was like a fish eye (ikan gapi you know!!)

hope your eyes doesnt caught any serious thing
hope your eyes stay the way it is
hope your eyes get well soon
if i found doraemon
im sure i will ask him about a gadget that can make you eyes better
but for now you should go to check it at your doctor
hopefully and im praying for you to get well
because i love your cute eyes and of course the owner of the cute eyes...

p/s: kamu!! itu saket kalu datang lagi u kasi pijam sama itu mata yaa... tp i mmg xkasi laa u jd pirate ker cyclop ker... take care dear!

a.l.o.n.e.

alone I drift away
alone I walk a thousand miles
alone I fall asleep
alone I stare at the sky
alone I sit under a tree
alone I cry

alone I dream of you
alone I hope and pray
to God who is so merciful and powerful
to let me find my way

alone I drift away
alone I live today
and alone I'll die someday

After awhile...

its kinda long time im not updated my blog
not really a long time...
it just sometimes i wanna write but still the time jealous towards me
hurmm~ but now here i am writing without endless point and path

Meanwhile...

im kinda loss of something
'something' that really important for me and for you
it fill my emptiness and courage me everyday
but it loss again
glued by glued it helps a bit
and now the chemical of it doesnt seems to hold on it
so, i losing it again
its weird and it bring sad to me when im not wearing it
replacement is a must
and im should do something here
otherwise, im live my life in my own empty space
sorry to you cause i loss our symbol
the symbol that guide us everyday and make us feel of it, when one of us being faraway
no matter what happen
im still what you think i am
and i will never make you feel sad about it...

deep inside me
it is something special about 'it'
deep inside me
it is memory we create it
deep inside me
it is you and me
deep inside me
it is everything...

damn dirty them

why should i get stuck here?
walking and acting like i own 8 hands and of course 8 legs
up down left right
circle it square it
all angle i should cover
man! even goalkeeper only cover his own goal post
why should i?
find found list
journalist
drag type creative-stoner
designer
haha understand what i mean?
try if you can...
damn dirty them

p/s: kamu~thanx for the nidji showcase + tag + VIP ya ;) im so happy to be with you on that day and i like gua's staff oledi...kehkehkeh

Advice from your sad friend

it almost 6.00pm
and this is it
the moment that my word been clarify
and he should throw the word to testify
whatever happen i knew you already
please change for a sake of your life
not for anyone... all this is for you
think about your parent, your brother and sister
they dont want you to be like this
inside me, im crying...
inside me, im deeply sad...

so make up your right decision!!
choose to change my friend!!

p/s: btw..kamu! i miss you...

Question to the 'other' me?

what else can i write?
am i an emo person?
why i always think the unthinkable matters?
am i hungry?
am i talking with myself again?

no! im talking to the 'other' me...
have no idea to mumble
so lets go out and take some refreshment...

What makes a friend

a friend
what makes a friend?
a friend
is someone that everyone needs
a friend
is that special one
a friend
is someone you tell EVERYTHING
a friend
is someone you never lie to
a friend
can be a boy or a girl
a friend
is someone that is always their
a friend
will always listen to you
a friend
always has input to give
a friend
will never leave you in the dust
a friend
will help you through the thick and the thin
a friend
will always stand by your side
a friend
will never let you down
a friend
is someone everyone needs
what would you do if you didnt have a friend?

p/s: i wish it was a nightmare!!!